i feel like anytime i talk to anybody... i feel like i'm bothering them.. and i don't like that feeling.. i wish i didn't feel like that.. because i don't kno if its true or not.. but i hope it's not.. i mean i've already talked to two people about it.. one just kinda made me pissed almost.. he said i wasn't easy for him to talk to.. well fine, thats how he thinks.. and now i'm talkin to another.. but he keeps tellin me it's not true and shit.. but i really think it is... --------------------------------------------- i always seem to notice things when it's too late... and then there's no chance of going back.. i've lost two great things.. and it's taken me so long to finally realize it.. i wish i woulda realized what i had back then.. then maybe things would be different... maybe i wouldn't want him so bad.. if i just had somebody else.. but i've lost anybody else that i've ever loved... i always loose the people that i love.. so why should i keep living like this..? just causing more pain to myself? but i can deal with pain.. i like pain.. but i prefer physical pain.. instead of emotional pain.. emotional pain, is just too much.. blahh i just don't kno anything anymore.......