Today was pretty okay. Way better than yesturday.
Tomorrow is our last day of gym (or our last day of dressing for a month..? I don't know that's just what the teacher said) so I'm pretty sad. I love gym, and I don't know if Health is going to be as good. The only good thing about Health is going to be seeing the naked pictures of people with STDs and talking about drugs and shit. But I bet the gang stuff is going to be pretty boring.
Rawr what a sexy beast.
Anyways, Ariel got AIM so we've been talking more, which is cool, since we're not on the same team and all we don't talk much.
Gretchen, Laura, and Frankie came to school yesturday. It was cool seeing them for the few min. that we did.
Oh my god. When Tara was mad at me (Sunday night) she IMd everyone on my buddy list and told them that I 'fucking hated them' eh. Oh well I guess. I don't think any of them who she told took it seriously.
I'm just SO glad he wasn't on that night, or he got a new screen name or whatever. I can't believe she would do that. Seriously if she did that I would have killed her.
I didn't know today was St. Patrick's Day till I came to school. The first thing I hear when I walk into the school is 'GREEEEEEN! *points to Alex's shoes*' and I'm like 'what...?' and they're like 'you're wearing green...' and I'm like 'Uh...so?' and they're like 'It's St. Patrick's day..' and I was like 'Then why are we at school?, isn't it a holiday?'
I felt stupid when I asked that..
Gosh, I'm so sick of green now. That's all I saw all day was people with Green hair, green faces, green clothes, green marker on there hands.
I'm just glad I wear Green chucks everyday.
HE SLAPED ME! Oh well, I guess I deserved it...
I miss him..
THIS SUCKS!
My new years resolutions:
Stop drinking Coke ow..that hurts
Stop putting myself down all the time.
Be much happier.
¢¾
Old school punk! You just say what you have to sayregardless of what everyone else thinks!You're one of my most favourite types ofmusic... You're raw and uncut! You'resurrounded by hype...just don't let it make yougo insane...
What genre of rock are you? brought to you by Quizilla
Today was okay. Nothing really happened...I guess. I finally get my math thanks to Miss/Mrs/whatever Maquein [sp?] [oh no, and I'm not in the resorce class, she was just in the Math room and she answered my question] So, I'm glad I get it now. Hmm...I also got an A+ on my Spanish quiz. I got a 44.5/40, because I also got the bonus questions right. Hmm...I'm starting to hate English again. I'm sick of talking about Anne Frank Ugh...whatever. Omigod, I think Mr. Barnette hates me...we got our tests back yesturday and I thought I got a D but I didn't I got a C and I went out of the class room and I was talking to LeeAnn and I was like 'I hate Socail Studies...I'm sick of failing all my tests..blah blah blah' and he was right behind me. I don't know if he heard me or not..hopefully he didn't.
Ew...my hair is getting more and more orange by the day. I'm sick of it. Well..it's not that bad...but I want my red hair back :'(
Tomorrow Gretchen, Taylor, Laura, Maybe LeeAnn, and I are all going to Daruma [sp?]. It's going to be fun. Gretchen said she'll ask Greg if he can come. I hope he can. I want Taylor to meet him.
YES TOMORROW IS FINALLY FRIDAY!!! Thank god. This week has seemed so long. Hasn't it?
Taylor is going to spend the night at my house. It's going to be fun. I can't wait!
I'm sick of Science. I'm sick of always getting a C or below on his quizes. God, I bet I have like a F in his class now. Grrr...Mr. Huffman is an asshole. And he always thinks I'm day dreaming in his class, which makes him call on me the most. Well, for the past week or so he hasn't called on me like once...so thats good...but whatever, I dunno. I just like complaining.
Okay, I don't really have anything to talk about..so I'm going to go...bye.
2 more days till Christmas.
I don't really know if I'm glad about that or not.
My throat hurts so fucking bad. Gah.
Tara is coming over today. We're going to dye her hair pink. I think it's going to look so fucking cool.
I have nothing else to say...
Ahhh I hate my hair. It's like I can't do anything with it. Gahh. She like cut off all the parts that make my hair all flippy and stuff I don't know. It's just weird. I wish she wouldn't have cut my bangs though....they used to be like to my shoulders and now they're like to my neck, and it just looks...differnt. It does feel really good though, but that doesn't help the way it looks. I can't like poof[sp?] it out because then it looks really weird. Godmotherfuckingdammit.
So, tomorrow Greg, posibly Catie, Tara, LeeAnn, and I are all going bowling. It'll be fun. I feel horrible, I haven't gone Christmas shoping for anyone yet. And their is only 4 more days till Christmas. I'm so fucking......................I don't know. Stupid?
I don't know what to talk about...
Lisa smells really good...
So, Catie is getting her braces off today....lucky. It's going to be forever till I get my braces off, because everyday you don't wear your rubbers, you have to wear your braces another 3 days. Shit.
Your Sexual Flavor Is Pineapple
Sweet, funky, and very persuasive.
On the surface, you're the sweetheart everyone wants.
And you're able to leverage that sweetness to get your way in bed.
So yeah, you tend to lay back and get a lot of tongue baths.
And you never have to lift your cute little finger in return.
Secret talent: Tantric orgasms
What's Your Sexual Flavor?
More Great Quizzes from Quiz Diva
Today was good, even though I didn't get to see Greg. I got a digital camera, it's the shiznit. I already used up all the memory in the camera so, I have to get a memory card soon.
This picture looks weird.
Patrick's party was fun. The thing that sucked though is I had to leave Greg there, I really didn't want to I tried to take him home with me, but my grandma and Patrick's mom wouldn't let me...
I'm getting my hair cut Tuesday, but not really a cut more of a trim, which is what I want, because I guess....I don't really like it when my hair is short....which is sortof weird because I've pretty much have had short hair since the 1st grade. Eh, whatever.
I know like half of the stuff I'm getting for Christmas. Well, like half of the clothing part. I got like 4 AFI shirts, 3 AFI hoodies, 1 very rare HIM hoodie from ENGLAND, 1 Thursday zip up hoodie, and that's pretty much all I know. I'm thinking I'm going to have a good Christmas
As I lie to my grandma telling her the one thing I wont do that I really want to do, it's killing me. Christmas just wont be the best without doing it. How could she make me promise not to do that??? She must have not heard about PROTECTION! Daaaaaaaaaaamn.
I feel bad now. I'm just realizing that I hardly talked or did anything at the party. God, I'm horrible.
I have no idea what he wants. I want to get him something perfect. I want to get them all something very special. What would they want?
my cheek is starting to hurt again, and I like bent the wire back so it wouldn't...but it didn't help any.
I LOVE YOU GREG!!!!!!!!!!! I'm the luckiest girl in the whole world.
Today was horrible. It started off with me waking up with a huge chunck of my cheek in my braces. My braces have carved a huge chunck out of my cheek. It hurts SO bad. Then Miss Linhart yells at me for no fucking reason. Greg and I were hugging, and it wasn't even like the hugs we usually give eachother and then she yells at me saying 'DON'T EVER DO THAT AGAIN!' Like we were making out or something. It was just a hug...god. Then I had to goto that stupid Ochrastra field trip. After that we had to goto FACS and The whole time Zach was calling me a hoe, a cutter, or something of that sort. Then in Ochrastra he kept kicking me. THAT FUCKER I HATE HIM!!!!! Then when I went to Spanish Miss Linheart was yelling at us the whole time. And now we have to sit in assigned seats and work in the book and work book. Then when I really wanted to go home, I remembered that I had to goto the stupid Ochrastra practise. Ian is such an asshole. It's funny how all my friends from last year who were guys I now hate with a passion.
I'm sick of this.
Oh...and tomorrow might suck to. Ya know why? I'm going to have to take a quiz and a test in Science and since I haven't been in Science for a while, I'm not going to have a fucking clue what it's about. Great...
I might right more later...bye
Today sucked. It should have been great though...but it wasn't. I had to goto a stupid ochrastra field trip, and I'll have to goto anouther one tomorrow. Then I don't know. I just seemed like...I wasn't being myself the whole time I was with all of them at the library. Then I also got Frankie and myself kicked out of the library. Mmmm....I hate this. The only good part of the day was seeing you. But...thats always the best part of all my days.
I'm so bored. And I'm still not feeling right. I haven't felt right in about a week and a half. I don't know why. Maybe it's because everyone around me is upset. Maybe it's because I haven't really talked to Tara in a long time. Maybe it's because I have no idea. Maybe it's because I'm alone. I hate it. I hate feeling like this.
So I got two books today. The Earth, My Butt, And Other BIG Round Things, which is about an over weight girl who has problems. And anouther book that Greg picked out called Stoner & Spaz. He said it was good. So...that's good.
I don't know what to talk about. Everything is weird. Everyone around me is acting weird. Everything is just...not right. Maybe it's just me.
I envy how pretty she is. She's so beautiful. I love her hair. Something about it today made it look...I don't know..but it was good.
God. I hate this. I don't want to go. I don't want to go....
Bend me break me
love me hate me
touch me want me
lose me judge me
i don't care as long as i feel something
Push me pull me
change me crave me
find me hide me
crush me try me
i don't care as long as i feel something real
Which His Infernal Majesty member are you? brought to you by Quizilla
Pervy Ville
Which Ville Valo (HIM) are you? brought to you by Quizilla
You are the one and only VILLE VALO!
Which member of HIM are you? brought to you by Quizilla
you are most like...
ff0000>VILLE!!!
the vocalist
which member of HIM are you most like? brought to you by Quizilla
OooOOoo You hit the jackpot!! Lucky lucky you mustbe a big H.I.M fan
Razorblade Romance? ....:::H.I.M:::.....fans brought to you by Quizilla
Wow! You rock. You sure know alot about the bestband in the world! Good job sweetheart :D (Ifyou like HIM you should check out The 69 Eyes)
How big of a HIM fan are you? brought to you by Quizilla
You are a true HIM fan fuck yea good job!
Do you really like the band HIM or are you a poser? brought to you by Quizilla
ya...I got bored.
I don't know. I just have no idea. I don't know what I'm feeling, but everyone has said I've looked sad today. And you just kept asking Are you okay? and I'd keep responding with the same answer...yes, but it was a lie. I don't know whats wrong. But something is. Maybe it's the fact that he broke up with her. I hate that. I hate it, they were perfect. Maybe it's how you kept on talking about how scars never go away. You know...you made me feel really stupid. OR maybe it's just how now my hair looks sort of like an orangish color. I don't know. Maybe it's how I don't get my Math homework, and how I got a C or a D on my Social Studies test that I thought I did so great on. Maybe it's how I forgot to bring my Social Studies book home. It might just be how I'm just so lost right now. Please...tell me I'm okay.
So, I got to see Catie today. It was nice. She said she liked my hair ALOT. I'm glad. Hmm...I miss her so much.
It's weird. How come I get the most calls when I'm not at home?
I think Deep Shadows And Brilliant Highlights is one of my favorite CDs again. Listening to Love You Like I Do makes me cry. I don't know why? Why would I like something that makes me cry?
God...your so hott. I'm so sorry I didn't tell you what was wrong. I just...I just wasn't quite sure if something was or not. I love you. I love you. I love you. I don't know, I felt like I wasn't really talking to you today. I felt horrible. I just...I don't know. Please. We'll be together forever...Right?
I want to be with you forever. I wish I could be with you all the time. I want to run away with you. I need you.
I don't know. I just don't know. I can't think. All I can think about is you...and how I have to do my homework soon...so...I'm going to go...bye.
Ya...I stole this from Taylor..sorry I got bored.
Thirteen random things you like
01) Greg
02) Eyeliner
03) Pink
04) AFI
05) Music
06) Blonde Hair
07) Eyes
08) Phones
09) Pictures
10) Hugs
11) Kissing
12) Snuggling
13) My friends
Twelve Movies
01) Fast Times At Ridgemont High
02) The Breakfeast Club
03) Nightmare Before Christmas
04) Not Anouther Teen Movie
05) Scary Movie
06) Scary Movie 2
07) Jaws
08) Jaws 2
09) Back To The Future
10) Back To The Future 2
11) Back To The Future 3
12) Uh...ya...I can't think of anymore
Eleven Good Artists/Bands
01) AFI
02) HIM
03) Thursday
04) Sum 41
05) The Ramones
06) Green Day
07) Funeral For A Friend
08) Taking Back Sunday
09) Blink-182
10) Otep
11) Nirvana
Ten Things You Like Physically About Others
01) Eyes
02) Hair
03) Lips
04) Teeth
05) Fingers
06) Mouth
07) Feet
08) Nose
09) Neck
10) Hands
Nine Good Friends -In no order-
01) Greg
02) Tara
03) LeeAnn
04) Taylor
05) Steph
06) Catie
07) Gretchen
08) Becca
09) Ariel
Eight Favorite Foods
01) Steak Quasadilla [sp?]
02) ...
03) ...
04) ...
05) ...
06) ...
07) ...
08) ....uh...I dunno.
Seven Things You Wear Daily
01) Shirt
02) Jeans
03) Bra
04) Panties
05) Socks
06) shoes
07) AFI hoodie
Six Things That Annoy You
01) Zach
02) Kortnee
03) Matt
04) Ben
05) Dan
06) People playing with my hair
Five Things You Touch Daily
01) Myself
02) My puss....nevermind
03) My Stereo
04) My braces
05) My CDs
Four TV Shows You Watch
01) Retrosexual
02) I Love The 80's Strikes Back
03) I Love The 90's
04) Uh...
Three Celebrities You Have a Crush on
01) ...
02) ...
03) ...
Two Things You Can't Live Without
01) Friends
02) Everything I own
Name One Thing You Want More Than Anything
01) To be with Greg forever.
Today was sucky. I don't know why...it just was. We had too much homework, which I haven't done yet, and it's 8:00, but oh well. I finished my Spanish and my Math, now all I have to do is take English and Socail Studies notes, which shouldn't be too hard because in English we just have to take notes over like 3 pages of 'The Diary Of Anne Frank The Play.' Oh and I'm really getting sick of Anne Frank. I swear. I'm not racist, it's just we have been reading about her for almost like 3 months now? It's horriblely boring. Everyone is sick of her. Why do we talk about dead people? It's not like they're that important. Yeah...I'm going to stop....
Then in Social Studies I'm almost finished anyways...so yea...
Also Tara has gotten like a couple people to start calling me names making fun of my red hair. It's really pissing me off. Anyways speaking of my red hair, the dye already is starting to come out. And now I guess it looks more of an orange...ew. I'm sick of it. Yesturday everyone was commenting on how much they liked my hair. And then I find out 2 of my friends don't like it, Tara is all like 'It's just not the Alex that I've known blah blah blah' and then he's like 'I liked it better the way it was' But then other people like Zach, Cierra[sp?], and a whole bunch of other people were like 'Yeah, you're blonde high lights were really crappy'-Zach 'I like this hair style ALOT more than your other one'-Cierra. God...either way..someone is ALWAYS unhappy with my hair. Why the fuck does it matter to them? I just...don't get it. Why do people always have to say something about my hair. It's like when other people dye their hair no one really comments. But oh no, when Alex dyes her hair..wow lets just make her feel bad or whatever. I don't know...I complain too much...I'm sorry. And it's not everyone....it's just Tara...she's always unhappy with my hair....like when I had the blonde high lights she didn't like it either...Hmmm...fuck you.
I'm so bored...
I don't know if he's grounded or not. He hasn't been on and he hasn't called me...so I'm guessing he is. He said something about being grounded or something of that sort yesturday. But I don't know.
Eh...I'm going to go...I don't really have anything to talk about.
So I dyed my hair red. I think it looks pretty cool, I think it looks even better than how my hair was before. Its nice, shiny, silky, and it still smells good :) hmm...
I really hope we can do something today.
eh...I have nothing else to talk about...so bye.
Edit: Today was fun. I went to the movies with Greg and LeeAnn. We went to see The Incredibles. Then after we were at the movies Greg and LeeAnn came over here for about...maybe 20 min.? I dunno. I had lotts of fun.
Hmm...OH FUCK! I forgot I have Science homework...god, I hate Mr. Huffman!
I want you to be happy. I want you to feel right. I don't want you to be upset. I love you. I love you. I love you. I care about you so much. Please be happy...please.
I love you
Today has been boring. Along with yesturday. I might get my contact today. I'm so worried, I'm so worried about you. Please I love you. I don't know what I'm going to do. Hopefully Greg and I can hang out tomorrow. I can't stand not seeing him. I love you. I love you. I love you.
I woke up late today...I didn't get up till like 12:00 which is sorta weird, maybe it's because I didn't get to sleep till 3:00 last night. I don't know...I was just laying in bed thinking about you all night. Wondering if I'll be able to see you Sunday or talk to you before Monday.
I can't wait till Winter Break. I can't wait till Christmas. :D
And it sounds like...armageddon
Sounds like...armageddon
Sounds like...cum and drink with me....
Cum and drink with me
And I remember him fucking me,
And I remember liking it,
I didn't know any better...
And I remember the smell, and the pain, and the shame...
And I remember being afraid and thinking everyday,
Every single day.. that it was my fault...
Oh, but what happened to that little girl?
Who used to dream of one day ruling the world,
Who used to draw pretty pictures in my room---beneath the moon
Destroying to create
Softly praying to "God"
What do I do now?
What do I do now?
As I secretely masturbate...
But then I'd hear his hooves coming down the floor
With a Bible in his hand...
Softly opening my door and he'd say...
DAUGHTER! The day of your attonement is due!
Well there's 3 million sinners out there...
and that includes you!
No daddy, don't... no daddy, don't...
LEAVE ME ALONE! LEAVE ME ALONE! LEAVE ME ALONE!
NO, I DON'T WANT TO BE FREE! NO, I DON'T WANT TO BE FREE!
SO TAKE YOUR DICK OUT OF ME!
PLEASE TAKE YOUR DICK OUT OF ME! PLEASE TAKE YOUR DICK OUT OF ME! PLEASE TAKE
YOUR DICK OUT OF ME!
I'm bleeding, it's not fair...
You see, there's this little place I like to go...
I like to run and hide--deep inside,
Where all the nightmares are real, and all the monsters come alive,
Oh, but the things I've seen in soft, soft visions and terrifying prophecies,
Like serpents on the take and gods coming in all sizes and shapes
Nothing seems fulfilling anymore..
Well your temples are swollen in deceit and the body of your missionary,
He's rotting... rotting in defeat mama?
MAMA!
Are the aliens coming to take us away? (mama?)
Is armageddon gonna happen again today?
LOOK WHAT HE DID TO ME! WHY DID YOU DO IT TO ME?!
HOW COULD YOU DO IT TO ME! WHY DID YOU DO IT TO ME?!
I will not cry... I will not cry...
I--PREFER--TO--DIE! than live--this life--of LIES!
KILL WHAT YOU CAN ---- CHALLENGE EVERYTHING
Vengeance is mine...
Hey, I'm sorry baby...
please come back inside...we can laugh a little... and live and die,
no wait. see, eye got this hot pot of jonestown tea
And it's been brewing for you and me,
Oh, it only takes one sip,
Come one baby,
Surrender your lips,
I can take you someplace nice...
I can take you...someplace NICE!
Breed my disease, be my disease...
Breed my disease, be my disease...
and vengeance will be mine
It's closer than u think...
So I entered his room at 32 past noon
With my little ritual knife...
I cut out his tounge
Liberated his wife
She loved me for it other world woman,
Well, thats what she called me (Destroyer),
the one who sets you free, (cum and drink with me)
We all die like cartoons, surrender your children,
kids who like to kill, lies...
Jonestown Tea
I can't get that song out of my head it makes me sad...
So, today has been pretty boring. I haven't done really anything. I've talked to LeeAnn all day on the phone, it was nice. She's a great person to talk to. Yesturday was fun. I went to my mom's house and everyone was there. Even though Amanda was there, nothing bad happened. She only said like 2 things to me. Uhm...yesturday my familly just kept asking me about Greg. We also played pool and stuff...and I couldn't play well...god...I sucked. Hmm...then Uncle Doug droped Stacy and me off at my house and later around 9:50 p.m. we went to see The Seed Of Chuckie which was a REALLY corny movie. After that we just hung out for a while and went to bed. Then we just hung out for a while and talked to people on AIM. God, she brung up some great memories...lol like 'bobcraig' and 'call me a bird'. Then she had to leave :( Oh well. I'll get to see Stacy again around Winter break. Uhm...yep...and that's been my ThanksGiving break so far. Hopefully Greg and I can do something Sunday. I acutally do have stuff I want to talk about now.
Aw...we [Aunt Michelle, Uncle Doug, Cousin Matt, and Cousin Stacy] were in the car, and my Aunt goes 'Your grandma is really pretty' and then Matt was like 'Yeah, she is' and then my Aunt goes 'Your mom is really ugly though' and Matt goes 'Yeah, Alex you look EXACTLY like your mom' then he said 'Too bad you don't look like your grandma.' They're so mean to me...my mommy is pretty...
Hmmm...I'm so bored.
I miss him so much. God, I wish you were here, I wish I could be with you...
Eh...I'm going to go...bye.
Today was okay. Tomorrow I get to see my mommy :) It should be fun. Hopefully. Hmm...I think I'm doing WAY better in school. Yesturday I got lotts of papers back from Mr. Barnette [sp?] and they were all A's and then today we got lots of papers back from Mrs. Conway and I got all A's, but I already know I have an A+ in her class...so that's not really surprising. Then in Spanish we got our quizes back and I got an A+, so everything is good...except Science, I got my quiz back today and it was a 5/11...which is also known as a F...eh.
God, this sucks.
Atleast someone loves me. LeeAnn called, it's been nice. Everyday she has been calling me. She's the greatest. Tara hasn't really called me all week...I feel un-loved...Aw..she's going to...that one place...over ThanksGiving break...:(
My teeth still hurt...stupid braces. I can't wait till I get them off...only 11 more months...I think.
LeeAnn said she thinks we'll be together forever. Hopefully we will, I think we will. Do you?
I just started crying for no reason last night. It was weird. I was just thinking. I was thinking about what if I lost them. The only people who make life living for. It made me really sad. I hate it when that happens...
Ugh...I didn't get to talk to him like I wanted to...oh well. Like we would have time to talk about what I wanted to talk about.
I hate Zach. Which I'm sure in a couple of days I wont anymore. It's like one week I'll think he's a total asshole and the next week it's just like...oh yea...that's Zach. He's so abusive. He hit me in my head today and it really hurt, then....god he's just so fucking...ugh.
Steph left us. She went to Georgia with Catie. I hope they're having fun. I wonder what they're doing.
He's so sexy. I love him. I'm so lucky. Mmm...
I feel like a nothing...again. Mainly because I have no idea what's going on. I wish I did. But I don't. I feel so stupid, I am stupid, even he said I was stupid. Ugh...god. I have no idea what to believe. I'm so scared. I promised I wouldn't...but...it's so hard, I'm not going to though. Even if nothing seems the way it is. Fuck. Just fuck. Fuck everything. I hate this. Why am I like this? I dont' know.
I just woke up...and I think it would have been better if I just stayed asleep...Just seeing that and...yea. I'm so weird. I'm going to lose him because I'm a fucking retard and can't even talk to him about the stuff he wants to talk about. And then their is her who is so perfect, and I bet she can talk to him about anything. Why can't I be like that?
God, everything is going wrong. My braces are starting to hurt again...and god. Why? Why? Can someone tell me why everything has to go wrong?
I'm so wrong.
Today was pretty good. I got LOTTS of A's in Math. She was handing back papers today and she like handed back 10 and I had all A's on them. It was great. I got my test back and it was a 100/100 and my quiz it was a 26/25 because I got the bonus too. Also I think I got a good grade on my Social Studies quiz. We were grading them today and if the person I thought had my paper did, then I only missed one question, which would mean I got a 22/24. Eh, I'm happy :)
God he's so fucking hott, I'm so lucky :D
My head hurt so bad today. It like started in Math class. It just got worse and worse. I think it's the lack of me wearing my glasses. God, I never wear them...
The first thing I did when I got home was goto sleep. If Tara didn't call me, I'd most likely still be a sleep.
I want a Coke...
But I said I wouldn't drink any...god dammit!
Zach can be such a fucking asshole at times. He was making fun of Faby in FACS today. What did she ever do to him? I hardly know her, but from what I do know, she's really nice. Then he started making fun of Robbie again...it's like everyday him and O'neal are always talking about Robbie. That's all I hear anymore. Robbie Robbie Robbie. From Tara, Zach, and O'neal. He moved, move on.
Eh...I think I failed my Science quiz today...wait...I'm 99% sure I failed. I like didn't put answers for like 5 of the questions and there was only like 11 of them. Fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck
I'm soooo thirsty.
God, I hope she's okay. Please be okay. I love you.
I can't write anymore...Bye.