yeah so, i was thinking, "maybe good charolette is right." and then i thought "how could good charolette EVER be right?" but maybe they are. girls don't like boys, girls like cars and money. i wrecked my car in february and it was my third recorded traffic offence. in the state of Tx if you have 3 traffic offences in a 12 month period and you have a provisional lisence(ie: under 18) you get your right to drive revoked for 90 days. and now my insurance is also prohibitively expensive. anyways.... since i've been carless, girls seem to be turned off, they are usually initially interested in me, but as soon as they find out my recently fired ass is broke and car-less their attitude takea a nose-dive and they usually decide they don't want to spend romantic afternoons making out and watching rented movies. or going on super cheap dates like bowling and to the beach. when they find out i'm taking them to jack-in-the-box instead of chili's. i guess they think it shows i don't care or maybe they are turned off by what it really is showing...i'm really fucking broke. my dad kicks me down 10 bucks here 20 bucks here, but the lake is dry, there are no jobs for the under 18 unless you got a serious hook-up. at this point i'd clean porta-pottys if it turned a buck. anyways, i have no car, i have no money, and i have no girl. coincidence?......................maybe. i didn't have a girlfriend before i wrecked my car and got fired from the Y. but still, i think it has something to do with it. that and the fact since i've always had horrible relationships and/or been shot down when i was completely in love, not like, love...well i have started putting up an "anti-intimacy shield"....i distance myself from advancing females, espescially the wierd, really ugly, or super forward ones, i gotta have standards right?. well, my standards have become really insane. 1., the un-changeable standard, she has to like me ALOT, or be my friend. 2. i get to know her first(see rule one) 3. physical attraction , i know , i'm shallow, blah, blah ,blah,etc. 4. similar tastes(semi-optional) 5. smokes weed(again semi-optional) 6. likes deftones(semi-optional) 7. obviously since we would share the same faith, hopefully we would also share the same values and moral code. 8. she gots to have ideals, yeah 9. ...and she gots to have style. 10. i need a girl who writes bass songs 11. ...and talks to Jesus all day long. 12. when i look at her i'll know. yeah so i'm nuts, but mostly i'm just scared, and it's going to take an awesome girl to change my mind. so in conclusion, life sucks, so smoke more spliff.