You know what, I've come to realize many things today. I mean, I wake up at 9:30 and go back to sleep until 2:30-3:00. I went to bed at like 3, so something is not right. I don't usually sleep for that long. I am depressed. I'm mad. I have a killer headache. I miss Luis. I harbor thoughts that we might really never see each other again. Life is not really going as planned. Yet, I need to see him. I need to get down to Virginia somehow. And this isn't a one-sided thing. He wants to see me. He needs me to go to Virginia. And the fact that my parents are now like "oh yeah, we're not going to Virginia" just makes me mad. What have I done today, anything productive? Well, besides kicking ass in StarCraft just because I use a shitload of cheat codes, I haven't done anything. Oh wait, I did eat dinner. I haven't said very much. There's obviously just no need for me to voice my opinions in this house hold. And I'm soooo close to just go outside and smoke some weed, not that I have any right now, but still. It's worthless. My voice is worthless. Even Jeremy doesn't care to go down to Virginia, and he hasn't seen Andrew, our cousin, in the longest time. June 19, 2007: the day I'm eligible to get my lisence. I'm only going to be seventeen. But come September, if Luis and I are still together, which I doubt we will be [he's a college boy = parties] but if we are, I'm so going down. I don't give a shit anymore if I miss some school. He's worth it. He believes I'm getting attached. I believe he might just be right. But he's such a nice, sweet guy. Oh wait, he might not be partying THAT much right now. He needs to pull a 3.7 GPA, which is something he's never done before. Right now his GPA is like a .73 or something. Man, I'm hoping he's joking about that. I'm glad he's going back to Virginia Tech. I have a feeling that I'm slowly trying to push some of my friends away. I just don't feel as they deserve to be in my business. I really don't know what I'm talking about. I'm so empty feeling. And then there's that one friend that I have started to confide in again because she actually listens to me. We're not even "best friends" and yet she still will tell me her opinions. At least in her, my opinions actually mean something, unlike in my family. I guess I'm going to go find some Advil or something and then see if I can get ahold of Luis. ♥ Man, I miss him too much.