When I find myself fading, I close my eyes and realize that my friends are my energy. I love my friends more than anything in the world. even when they fuck up. but probably the best feeling, is knowing that even after i fuck up, they still love me too. I find this less and less evident lately. and it kinda makes me wonder. I hate that i feel like i have lost some of them. it crap. and its really scary. I would do anything for the people i love, i would even die for them. But the trouble is not so much dying for a friend, it is finding a friend worth dying for. i havent quite figured out all of them yet, but i know i will. and if not. . . i have to just let them go. . .