There are too many words that I wish you never meant.. but they're just words.. and I'm just me. I'm in an advanced English class, and one day about two weeks ago we had to write an entire narrative on our computers in class. Holy crap that was hard! For me, and most people, it is easier to write about pain than anything else. Jacob has caused me the most pain.. so I wrote 5 pages of pain for an hour. Definitely my most depressing work. I wrote about what we were, are, and what I think we are going to be. Here are some excerpts from my paper.. sorry if they don't make sense out of context. "By now the tears themselves had become painful. It was as if they were needles flowing around the curves of her cheeks in obvious contempt for the place on which they tread. Even they hated her for what she had done to him." Someone once wrote: Times takes it all whether you want it to or not. Times takes it all. Time tears it away. And in the end there is only darkness. Sometimes we find others in that darkness and sometimes we lose them there again. "Some lives are wasted thinking about what might have been or what could have been. The possibility is what keeps most going; not the guarantee of better days that have yet to come." Tonight at church was wrong is so many ways. Jacob is still not a member of my church but he brought his new girlfriend.. to my church.. where he knew that I would be. He was practically begging for us to fight. But as odd as it sounds, I felt more comfortable around her than I felt around him. I wanted to hate her.. she had taken my love and my best friend away from me. I don't know.. I just DON'T. I can't think about this anymore. Everything was starting to become so perfect again and I'm not going to let my smile leave without a fight this time. I've met someone new.. and we're doing awesome. I will learn to forget him like he has forgotten me.