"i said it i said it i said it, maybe i wanted it, maybe i was scared, maybe we knew it all along and i still cant figure it out or maybe just instead it was all because of my mouth and the way that i talk and the way that i would and couldnt move against you, that made you stop loving me. i still dont think that i honestly know what to do. the scent of memory, sticky against old teeshirts, pool towels, shampoos that we used when making love in the shower... the things that we've been through. these that just make me not understand anything and how it could end up so bad after you asked me to marry you. you said that we could do it, that we were old enough and that you loved me and then you kissed me and we'd fall down onto those sticky wet fingers, disappear and be together forever...I'm going crazy. You're the only girl I'll ever really love. I've forgotten about the ones that taught me to smoke, about photos and movies and my unambitious love of drugs, i've forgotten about them and all the ways we'd kiss and braid flowers into our hair. because i love you i love you i love you, its continually falling out of my mouth, falling from my hands, and these words are exhausted screaming off of my skin,all of the y o u's sketched there after you'd left me to sleep, look up at me in my window your eyes so full of stars and the fact that i miss your cheeks and freckled hips, i can imagine you and you and the pale curves of your body, like the cream of a guitar. you could play it and me so well. come back to me. in my head, a town full of those asleep"