love tears you apart, and it makes you run from everything. everything that you've associated yourself with when you were IN love. everything you were proud of, that was borne out of love. things that once made the sun shine in the beauty of a tree-filled back yard. Now i see those coloured glowing orbs on my street, in some strange house, i've seen your brother standing outside of a smoke shop, asking my boyfriend to buy him cigarettes. If I was able to, I would have! I mean, i was in the same postition, mostly borne out of my love for that tall, wide eye-d girl. Now, look. I can't even run five minutes. it tears you apart, and knowing us, atleast knowing how we were (together) we have been looking for love in all the wrong places. It's as though we've displayed ourselves as if we were artists models, except now we're standing naked in concrete. Our silver skin all tarnished, filled with chips and cracked, very used. Who wants us now? You're mom is dating an asshole, someone who is probably more emotionally powerful than your father was. Don't get me wrong, I love your mother and your father, very much. I'll always remember the fun with you and your family. It's just terrible that thigns are like this now. You need your mom, your family to be together again. But, I know you'll pull through, you're a tough nut. You're as strong as your voice. And if it's one thing I've learned: It's better to be alone, only carry people around you as someone you should say: hey, or hello to, not letting them get to close. Take care of yourself, don't depend on anyone else and all that good stuff, because you're the only one there for yourself in the end. I don't want to lecture you, because I know you and your pretty brain already knows all of this. I've learned it the hard way. Through a boy () who I really couldnt stop making love to, keeping my hands off him etc. We had this magnatism that was nothign emotional but pure sex. And through drug dealers, lesbians, my mother and abusive boyfriends. I'm still tormented through everything. I don't trust anyone. But, with doing that, atleast I don't emotionally abuse myself anymore. I'm all I have. And, like I said, I KNOW you know that. I know you'll take care of yourself SOON. You WILL figure things out, no matter how lonely you are; i rreally will always love you. I'm always here to talk: because you were always there for me. I love you so much, Shealynie. Taylor xxxoxox