I now realize that there is no such thing as love. Sure you love them, but in reality, do they love you, I don't think so. All they want is a piece of ass, or a summer fling here and there. Fuck guys anyway, I have a new way to deal with the pain. Now I am broken, shattered, I don't think I can be repaired. I will never smile again. What's the point? I don't see one, people who smile are people who are happy, anf happy is something I am not. I don't even think happiness existes anymore. It's just an illusion, one that gets your gard down, and then bam, a sludge hammer gets slammed directly into your heart. What do you do, when he still tells you he loves you? Love, ha, what is love? I will answer that for you, chemical sygnals sent through the body giving you the illusion of love. But once they are sick of you, what do they do? they stop calling, stop answering your calls, and then when they are caught, what do they say? "I don't know why," well that's just bull! I gave you my heart, and what did you do? Tossed it around and then decided to play some fucked up game. "I want us to work," Bull shit, you just want to break my heart some more, then smash it into the fucking floor! Mel