Hello, today sux! I didn't know today was day light savings time, and well I was late to work. Then I fould out that David never loved me, what is the point in telling someone you love them when you don't? I never tell people I love them when I don't. I mean, seriosly, it's just stupid. So uhhh yeah, this is grand. I don't know, maybe I should just forget about relationships and move on with my stupid noexistant life. I swear, my life sucks! I'm adicted to drugs, smoking, and drinking. The other day i was shrooming and drinking a lot, it was bad. I had almost a whole bottle of after shock to myself. My goal of the night was to drink the whole bottle to myself. I almost did it until i puked my guts out. I just had a really bad trip. I was sitting in a corner crying. Just realizing that I didn't mean anything to David. I was rocking back and forth, and then I had the bright idea to try and kill myself from drinking to much. So I tried to drink more, luckily my little sister Miranda took the bottle away from me. That's pretty sad, I'm not a suicidal person, and for some reason I had these stupid thoughts in my head. Then after caying some more I realized that I don't like my life and the way it's going. I'm going to try and take a step, I need to make a change. So I'm going to give up drinking and doing the drugs. It'll be hard, especially seeing how every one of my friends do it. But I think I can. I beleive in myself, even if nobody else does. Well that's my sad little story. Later Melissa