repeat
Listening to: stinkfist - tool
Feeling: dizzy

other people would frolic and play, etc. however i never quite forgot about the ever so obvious boundary the adults had on the girls. we were raised to be dependent, and passive, however, the boys were allowed to explore which caused them to develop a strong sense of independence and assertiveness... qualities i longed for, and continue to thirst for.

my hunger to become independent and stay independent will never be satiated. at least not in this world.

to be told that you're not supposed to be here doesnt help either. its not fair that people have all the materials, the information, and the money to thrive in life, and they totally neglect what they have, and choose an option which takes them ... oh so very ..very far..... right.

what do i care.. oh well.

is there really a true good in human. i mean, i dont know.. i dont think i believe in heroes. if we take an action to help others, its because we know that if we dont, it'll remain in our conscience for the rest of the day. also, we are pressured to committ the heroic action by the public(those around us).

i dont really know what im doing (does this sound familar?..)well, UCSC.. here we go. now.. to start with the personal statements... hm....?

256 hit(s) Ignore the smoke  
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Entry List
time
the turn
hm
howl
blank
balance
gums
water
focus
the light
relapse
remedy
dry
moving on
intentional.
balance
fish
july
leaving
jardin
friction
being heard.
blank
comfortably numb
paint.
truth.
sleep.
waiting
free.
alone
the calm
oy.
salt
voice
hurts to breathe
lids
breathing
buzz
gum
more to bear.
hurt
blank
i see.
ears are burning.
waiting.
little black pill
fuck anything that moves
cold
blister
ride
5th
sore
tightness
fog
a need
sick puppy.
fairness
bridges
lines
ha
where is my mind
peel
congestion
movement
growing
sleeping on the kitchen...
cracks and pops
top top top
awake
TODAY.
i'm many things but not a...
own it.
three years older
!!!
cold wall
safe space
9
explain this to me please
blank
blank
blank
blank
blank
:o
blank
blank
:)
mm
wow
click
again
blank
blank
shimmy shimmy
blank
blank
blank
what?
blank
ahem...
the truth is...
hello
i'm good
halt... what the third time...
chirp
what is it
blank
tremble
can't even breathe
josh ya
blank
blank
clear
blank
ay
esperanza
capricious
choice
did we just have a moment?...
dizzy
stretch
"let me give you some more...
dream
corn
yack
fiddling
blank
here
allay me
it was my muffin..
if
"dante's inferno" pt. 2
revoked
"dante's inferno"
edge
recollecting
the twitch
eh
repeat
hollow?
weak
blank
there
blurry
choke
heh
just
blank
blank
blank
FOOK YOU
fook
*dot dot dot*
out with the old! in with the...
?
ouch..?
question
life death blah
plane
blank
blank
sky
the wheels on the bus go...
it?
spring dreaming
SMILE, it makes the world go...
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