i'm... i really don't know what to say. 08 has been one of the most challenging years for me. ha, this is just me... i can't imagine how my mother feels. to write it... i really can't do it without gritting my teeth... i'll write it when i'm ready. a child having a child, a possibility... and who'll take care of the child? who other than me. i didn't, couldn't believe what had happened... the family has just begun to recover. funny really, didn't burst an artery... no... i was just there... helping. now more than ever i realize she really is a child... and it hurts. my mom's not doing so well... here we go again right? there's little i can do... it hurts. my dad, ay... thinking about this... everything... what could happen.. be happening... it's too much. i think i'm going to stay... state can't be all that bad... less expensive... :)..... local... i could stick around for my parents... help out... i really don't know. change mood.. eesh... ok ok... on a lighter note... so... that guy... from school.. haha... ay... we saw eachother, right after my bio lab, and well... we hung out... kissed. ay. we left it at... "if we see eachother, let's go out" that's it. mhmm that's it. noooooooooow... two weeks later.. the other guy... my close friend... he calls.. we talk... he calls.. we talk... he calls.. we talk. i go see a WWII movie, i tell him about it... he tells me to invite him next time.... 2 days later... my cousins, sis, her bf and i go to the movies.. meet him there... haha he's tall. mhm. it wasn't really 2 friends going out... time passes... call, talk... call, talk... nada. a few days pass... i call on new years... he doesn't answer... later that morning he calls... we're at the theatre.. him and i... we eat... hang out for a little... kiss. ay. a few times... terrible. i know. ay. he calls, we talk. he calls, we talk... i get a new phone with txt... i txt him, tell him about it... ever since then... we've been texting... ay. rofl really. jeez, it's not cheesy shit either... haha.. funny. he's no boy. hahahahaha ay. ridiculous. completely. yet, i sink further. we're going out this weekend... hopefully all goes well. it's a double with my right hand. i'm terrified of everything. haha my dog too... poor thing.