trust, something you just dont toy with... leading people on..canto do that either.. lying...that hurts too.. desire....hmm here to stay.. want need want need want need want need want.. life, struggle....oy "if you're not struggling...YOUR NOT LIVING!" "someday you'll have a beautiful live, somday you'll be a sun...in someone else's sky" just..dont fuck with it.. it hurts too much..just too much trust..just too much man, i cant even write it down. ha... why? bloody hell, why the fuck was it me? why not her or him? ... if it wasnt me...i wouldnt be like this. i would be normal..i would be ok. i would speak...i wouldnt cry... and now im not talking about crying for no damn reason.. whenever i do...i just cry...and think noooo....ooooooooo oooooo....no...get away, stop it... and blank. blank i would be able to remember everything..well almost everything...more than now.. sometimes i thank myself for not being able to remember if i did..i dont know.. cant trust them, cant..cant..cant too risky..too risky... <><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><> what if, what if? what if there were no computers..no cars.. what if there were no goverment... what if sex was painful.... what if there was no currency what if.... ..hmm... -blue