oh goodness...... i don't know what to do with myself... i am terrified... i mean, i was shaken up enough this morning... but now... i dunno... i just got the closest i've ever been to fighting with leah... and now i don't know what to do... i'm so confused, i don't know what to do... she's got me thinking... and i'm considering... but no, that would be like throwing away the past two years of my life... i just.... man, if i could draw... then i'd draw a picture of a girl in the middle of a white, windowless, doorless room, on her knees with her head in her hands... because that's what i feel right now.... yet at the same time... i feel completely exposed... like i'm naked on international television or something.... i'm gonna snap... and then i'm gonna break.... and it's not gonna be pretty... oh gosh, just shoot me, please... Kyr

*loox around* i'm getting bored with this diary... it needs something different... maybe something that doesn't state HI! I'M SABRA THE FOREVER-HAPPY PERSON! so much as hey, come on in and chill out..... but i suck at this kinda thing... maybe i'll get britto to do it for me... i dunno... i like the stars still.... *shrugs* i'll worry about it later... well, i think i'm gonna go listen to more goo goo dolls............ later daze y'all...

WOOHOO I GOT A JOEL HUG!!!!!!!!!! lol and only like 2 people in this world other than me know just how awesome it is to get a joel hug! because joel hutton is an awesome guy that gives the best hugs EVER!!!!!!!! hee hee, that totally made my day... no, wait, it made my entire week! haha... and tomorrow he's playing for my church's morning service so i'll get to see him again and get another joel hug!!!!!!!!! WOOHOO!!!!!!!!! lol eryk, charles, jo, and jake are gonna be here soon... and it's gonna be so funny when jake walks into the kitchen and sees all the cookies on the table haha... can't wait to see his reaction. okay well i'm sure you're having so much fun trying to keep track of all these people that i'm talking about that you've never heard of in your life... okay, well ya know what? that's okay! hahaha omg www.joelhutton.com is awesome! hee hee! mainly because it has everything to do w/ joel and his band! YAY! he's gonna be famous someday!!!!! YAY! i can just see their first cd cover... w/ him wearing the imfamous "CHICKS HATE ME" t-shirt! hee hee! i'm so happy!!!!!!!!!!!! and leah gets ungrounded in 35 minutes woohoo! okay well my mom's yelling at me to go to bed.... grr... bye! Brin of Shady Vale

okay, i saw hp3...... no, don't worry, i'm not gonna spoil this one for you! lol let's just say.... i could rave about it for awhile, but i could also go just as long trashing the name of alfonso cuaron.... heheh...... it was so much more compressed than the others... but... daniel radcliffe... what more can i say? lol well, i'd still go see it again, but... yeah... lol later daze!

yeah, just felt like putting these lyrics up cuz i'm listening to the song... haha Perfect by nature, icons of self-indulgence Just what we all need More lies about a world That never was and never will be Have you no shame, don't you see me? You know you've got everybody fooled. Look here she comes now - Bow down and stare in wonder. Oh, how we love you No flaws when you're pretending But now I know she - Never was and never will be You don't know how you betrayed me And somehow you've got everybody fooled. Without the mask Where will you hide? Can't find yourself, Lost in your lies I know the truth now I know who you are And I don't love you anymore Never was and never will be You don't know how you betrayed me And somehow you've got everybody fooled. Never was and never will be You're not real and you can't save me And somehow now you're everybody's fool. Cora

BOOOORING!!!!! lol went to the battle re-enactmant at the bridge tonite w/ a few frenz and jacob's cousins who are in town... he hit me! for no reason! he just smacked me across the face! TWICE!!!! *sigh* what is our group of friends coming to...? meagan's not around cuz she's to busy hangin out w/ ashly so jacob no longer has anyone to pick on, so he picks on me! *flusters* so he let me smack him back and i hit him real hard...lol... yeah yeah yeah i know what you're thinkin, and the answer is no i don't! lol newayz, it was real boring we left home @ like 6 and met up w/ everyone else at dairy queen and walked down to the library and a dog tried to attack eryk and jacob... and then we hung out in dairy queen's parking lot for an hour or better... and the actual re-enactment was so dumb, they shot their guns maybe 3 times each and were done... so we hung there for another hour and went home... yeah... that would be my life... *laughs* but tomorrow nite's gonna be fun!!!!!!! party @ my house 6-8 pool, food, the worx! then when the uth group leaves my frenz and i are gonna watch pitch black!!! woohoo! and btw, y'all from the lunch table are invited! just come hang out, it'll be fun! hee hee! well newayz i think i'm gonna go... maybe i'll actually write for the first time in forever... newayz later daze!

no, i didn't write it, but found it on the net... struck me by surprise how well it described me... When no one is there for you And you think no one cares When the whole world walks out on you And you think you're alone I'll be there When the one you care about the most Could care less about you When the one you gave your heart to Throws it in your face I'll be there When the person you trusted Betrays you When the person you share all your memories with Cant even remember your birthday I'll be there When all you need is a friend To listen to you whine When all you need is someone To catch your tears I'll be there When your heart hurts so bad You cant even breathe When you just want to crawl up and die I'll be there When you start to cry After hearing that sad song When the tears just won't Stop falling down I'll be there So you see I'll be there until the end This is a promise I can make If you ever need me Just give me a call and... I'll be there... But will you be there for me? yeah...i question that sometimes...

okay, so ya know how in finding nemo, dory and marlin are in the crevace thing and there's the lightbulb that they're chasin and they're singin and happy and everything, and then they see the teeth and all of a sudden they're not all shalala happy? *smirks* yeah... that's... that's pretty much what's goin down right now.... there's truth in the saying what goes up must come down... i'm just here cuz i've got nuthin to do... so on tonight's show, we have, behind... door #1: the living room, where my parents are watching Something's Gotta Give. puleez. door #2: my room, a place of solitary confinement and hopelessness on a saturday night on which i have nothing to do door #3: the computer, where i get to pretend that i have a social life, just like the little kids on barney... not much of a choice, huh? ...yet here i sit... *rolls eyes at herself* later daze Morieh Undomien (shadowed evenstar)

did you know that it's 86 degrees outside?! heheheh bout an hour ago erik and i decided that we were so bored we were just gonna go bike... mind you, i haven't touched a bicycle in 3 years. well, we decided to take upper hart to gran's house.... almost five miles, and man lemme tell ya that was a mistake! haha i'm sooooooo out of shape so when we got to gran's i was like, dead.... gran said i was five different shades of red lol so she drove me home after about 20 minutes... erik rode home cuz gran said there was an easier route... so he should be home in about 10 minutes or less... but newayz, it was fun so we're thinkin bout goin biking every saturday mornin this summer (i get to have muscles! YAY!) lol well i'm gonna go shower and see if a couple people can come over and goof off later daze ya'll! Sleepy Sabra

i just picked a random mood... i don't actually feel radiant lol... i'm not doin much, just bored so i thought i'd come here.... talkin to jacob online, justin's on the comp next to me (he's spendin the nite...) and annoyin the heck outta me... and i'm probly gonna be goin to bed soon cuz i'm gettin up @ 6 in the mornin tomorrow... yuck! lol and christine, GIVE ASHLEY HER NOTEBOOK BACK NOW! ......please? hee hee well i'm gonna go find something to do now so later daze! Sabe Babe

not much happened today, i'm thinking about writing a story... wow that's a first in a long time.... heheheh spent today thinking of characters... speaking of which, i can't come up w/ a last name for a guy named Alex... any suggestions? geez i think i'm going thru withdrawal of some sort cuz i'm more tired than usual and i've had a headache for the past 3 days that won't go away even after an adjustment from my daddy (chiropractor), massage, or pain killer... and i'm goin insane from it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! well newayz here's a quiz thing General Info full name : Sabra Leigh Snider siblings ; erik and the energizer bunnies from hell nicknames : Sabe, Sabe Babe, Sabular, Samara in DnD, Sweet Stuff... the list goes on birthday : July 27 school : South Kunokz height : 5' 8 or 9" age : 13 age you act : anywhere from 2 to 16, it varies current location : hickville eye color : sea green hair color : light brown, but i dare call it blonde when i act it righty lefty or ambidextrous : ambidextrous on most things zodiac sign : Leo Are You A... daydreamer : huh, what? sorry, i missed the question... freak : at times bitch : " " angel : " " nerd : nah Have You Ever gotten in a car accident : define 'accident' hee hee loved someone so much it made you cry : love? no. strongly like? plenty of times hiked a mountain : up, no. down, yes stayed home on a saturday night just bcuz : pretty much every saturday is like that hurt yourself : plenty of times, tho usually not on purpose been out of the country : no, but i plan to eaten something that made other people sick : don't think so... been in love : nope done drugs : define 'drug' gone skinny dipping : no comment had alcohol : nope had a medical emergency : sorta had surgery : not that i remember ran away from home : i followed my dad's car one time when i was three and got across the road... but i don't think that counts played strip poker : maybe, maybe not gotten beat up : nope beaten someone up : maybe.... been picked on : every day been on stage : all the time! slept outdoors : yup! thought about suicide : thought about it, but not really as an option gone one day without food : more than one talked on the phone all night : nope, but i've talked all day w/ tristen! slept all day : almost killed someone : thought about it thought you were going crazy : little by little the energizer bunnies drain my sanity... been betrayed : who hasn't? had a dream that came true : lots of 'em broken the law : okay what teen hasn't illegally downloaded something? met a famous person : plenty have you ever killed an animal by accident : lots of bugs... but they weren't by accident stolen anything : don't think so been on radio/tv : both had a nervous breakdown : went totally postal once had a dream that kept coming back : plenty... worst feeling in the world : losing a friend best feeling in the world : being with your best friends, knowing that nothing could tear you apart one thing you want to change about yourself : God made me special just the way I am are you a health freak : slightly About The Past places you have lived : hickville schools you have gone to : St. John's Lutheran...Flaget...SK About The Future occupation : something fun, that can keep me interested dream car : anything that moves marriage : if i find the right guy kids : don't really care honeymoon : don't really care where u will live : in a house Favorites food : food is good commercial : music videos movie : long list song : long list soda : vanilla pepsi city : don't have one radio station : 94.9 drink : vanilla pepsi website : this one, bored.com, quizilla game : cards animal : wolf, tiger, peregrine falcon physical feature of the opposite sex : eyes, but that's not what makes the boat float word or saying : love God, love people... or John 15:13... uber is a fun word too book : verrrry looooooooooong list place to be : w/ my best frenz person : long list shopping store : borders bookstore cd store : wally world junk food : not that big on it anymore... ice cream flavor : triple fudge brownie restaraunt : Red Lobster fast food resturaunt : micky d's or subway pizza topping : pepperoni place to order pizza from : anyplace but bobes candy : peppermint gum : don't really care... fruit : all of 'em holiday : christmas, b-day, new year's eve season : all have their advantages time of day : sunset, dusk, and right before dawn day of week : any day i don't have school time of the year : when i don't have school weather type : really bad thunderstorms... or freezing rain, just cuz it's so dangerous instrument : ah... music... a magic beyond any other... cd : don't have one band : don't have one type of movie : mystery, horror, sci-fi, BROADWAY, fantasy... pretty much everything but dumb comedy and flesh-eating zombies tv channel : 39 thing to spend $ on : cds, dvds, cd-roms..... BOOKS accessory : my giant silver hoop earrings well there ya go, my life in a nutshell. later daze! Spaz

hi... bored... well, not so much bored as slightly depressed. not so much depressed as having the mindset of "the world doesn't get it. go away." *groans* people are annoying today... yet somehow i managed to make it thru the day actin perky and hyper and all that fake crap... ugh, i feel a cold one comin' on and i'm not too happy about that fact, cuz even if i can't write worth crap when i'm not depressed in some way or another, at least i felt like i had a purpose... now i'm just like... go away, there's no point... well, whatever... later daze

i'm boooooooooooooored!!!!!!! AAAAAAARRRRRGGGGGGHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!! haha i'm talkin to justin and britto right now, kinda wish i could talk to jacob, he's always got something interesting to say. but don't we all? yet still most of us go to our grave with our music still inside of us. tis a sad thing. this friday i'm leavin for good ol' camp challenge for a uth retreat!!!!!! yay! just one fun weekend at my fave place on earth w/ some of my fave peeps on earth!!!!!! yeah buddy! haha i'm excited. today in music i found out i'm the only person that likes audio adrenaline. it's a shame, they're the kewlest! haha well other than that i've got nothin goin on, so later daze yo! Sabe Babe

so, it's been awhile.... waddup? camp has come and gone... it was totally crazywickedawesome..... or, as carissa would say..... awesomesupercoolrad haha. lots of new friends, lots of old friends, and a ton of Jesus. heck yes. so... i don't really like this thing much.... and i've definitely been sucked into myspace....... so.... umm.... yeah. it's been a totally drama-free summer so far, and that totally rocks. it's just been fun. which is awesome. on the downside, all my best friends are leaving me this fall.... but on the bright side, i get all summer with them and by the time they're gone, i'll be able to drive, so i can go see them! yay! and i predict frequent trips to indy in the future...... i miss everyone from CATC way too much not to go. umm... not really much else to talk about. but i'm gonna put the lyrics to a new song up here, cuz it's totally my current fave song. it's by a friend of mine, his name's Nathanael Hency, and he's awesome, so go to myspace and look him up. anyway... here it is. Already There *** Welcome home Step out of the rain And into my arms Your hair still looks great Sit on down Kick of your boots All calloused and worn They summarize you. You stare at the floor You won't find the words If you shut taht door You'll never be heard You can't buy the sun To shine your way home You can't hail the wind To carry you on So just call my name We'll make it I swear We'll build you a home Cause you're already there You're already there Sing me a song A song of the war. And battles we've lost That's what songs are for. Play me a tune Something of yours And I'll sing along Or hum through the words You stare at the floor You won't find the words If you shut that door You'll never be heard. And you can't buy the sun To shine your way home You can't hail the wind To carry you on So just call my name We'll make it I swear We'll build you a home But you're already there... And you can't buy the sun To shine your way home You can't hail the wind To carry you on So just call my name We'll make it I swear We'll build you a home But you're already there... You're already there. yeah, so, it's an awesome song. well, i'm gonna head out. later daze! ...i almost miss you.... almost.... Sabe

so, it's been awhile.... waddup? camp has come and gone... it was totally crazywickedawesome..... or, as carissa would say..... awesomesupercoolrad haha. lots of new friends, lots of old friends, and a ton of Jesus. heck yes. so... i don't really like this thing much.... and i've definitely been sucked into myspace....... so.... umm.... yeah. it's been a totally drama-free summer so far, and that totally rocks. it's just been fun. which is awesome. on the downside, all my best friends are leaving me this fall.... but on the bright side, i get all summer with them and by the time they're gone, i'll be able to drive, so i can go see them! yay! and i predict frequent trips to indy in the future...... i miss everyone from CATC way too much not to go. umm... not really much else to talk about. but i'm gonna put the lyrics to a new song up here, cuz it's totally my current fave song. it's by a friend of mine, his name's Nathanael Hency, and he's awesome, so go to myspace and look him up. anyway... here it is. Already There *** Welcome home Step out of the rain And into my arms Your hair still looks great Sit on down Kick of your boots All calloused and worn They summarize you. You stare at the floor You won't find the words If you shut taht door You'll never be heard You can't buy the sun To shine your way home You can't hail the wind To carry you on So just call my name We'll make it I swear We'll build you a home Cause you're already there You're already there Sing me a song A song of the war. And battles we've lost That's what songs are for. Play me a tune Something of yours And I'll sing along Or hum through the words You stare at the floor You won't find the words If you shut that door You'll never be heard. And you can't buy the sun To shine your way home You can't hail the wind To carry you on So just call my name We'll make it I swear We'll build you a home But you're already there... And you can't buy the sun To shine your way home You can't hail the wind To carry you on So just call my name We'll make it I swear We'll build you a home But you're already there... You're already there. yeah, so, it's an awesome song. well, i'm gonna head out. later daze! ...i almost miss you.... almost.... Sabe

woohoo, this thing got fixed. um..... went to maryland for my cousin's baptism, shopped till i literally dropped haha... camp is in less than a week! YEAH! umm... i don't really like this thing much anymore. love myspace tho... now that i've finally been sucked into that juggernaut fad... haha. oh well. umm... tomorrow is toooooosday which means 5 dollar ticket and freek popcorn at the movies.... yay! gotta figure out what i'm gonna go see. just stopped in to say hey and i'm still a spychotic loser! haha. later daze! Sabe

hey, so, um, i went back and read my entries from a year ago, when school was just getting out.... wow. talk about a three-sixty. i vividly remember coming home from school on the last day, and all the guys were in the pool and i layed down on the wet patio carpet and said, "man, it's been a long year." and that year had definitely sucked. this year... it was cool. it was fun. i feel like everyone in my class finally became best friends w/ everyone. and there was hardly any drama all year. sure, there was a bit... but life would be boring without it, lol. but, really, reading all those old entries just proves to me that this diary is a perfect record of my life, and of me at my worst. because this is where all the excess emotion flows so that i'm able to function as a normal person. (wait... i'll never be normal lol) but hey, it's cool. so.... um... that's all i really have to say for today. two days of school left and i'm excited, but i'm not sure if i'm quite ready to go yet. but hey, time drags when we want out and flies when all we wanna do is hold on. so.... carpe diem, i guess. later daze, all.... random quote of the day: Et tu, Brute? Sabe

so... umm... the other night i had a dream about one of my friends, and then woke up realizing i hadn't hung out with everyone in like, three weeks. i mean, i've seen..... two people since spring break. kinda sucks. everyone's just so busy w/ end of the year crap... i miss them all! lol... and tomorrow's their last day of school... and then they're leaving me all by myself for forever!!!! *sniff sniff* but yesterday, a bunch of seniors went on a field trip to USI and i guess on the bus ride all the guys called me... and i didn't have my phone w/ me cuz i was in skool... so they left me 18 voicemails... so last night i spent like, 20 minutes listening to them and laughing my head off... they sang me songs... lol. it's cool... because last year the same thing happened w/ all my senior friends and now we don't hang out, but this year, everyone really stepped up to the plate trying to make me feel better. i'm glad a lot of them are going to vu... but i'm losing a lot of them too... *sniff sniff* there's gonna be a lot of road trips goin on next schoolyear.... lol. well... on the bright side of everything.... i only have four days of school left!!!!! and camp is in 25 days, 17 hours, 45 minutes! yeah! man, this is gonna be an awesome summer. i wish everyone could go to IYC, but that's okay, it's still gonna be fun and i can have a huge b-day party when i get home. man, the sky is freaking awesome today. i should call devon, and we can watch the clouds go by together.... even tho he'll be looking at different clouds. but when the sun sets, we'll be looking at the same stars. yeah! well... i'm gonna go now cuz i have a spanish final to study for... two days down, one day to go.... i think i'm doin okay so far, hopefully i keep my A... i'm on the edge of it, so i'll keep my fingers crossed. lol. well..... bye everyone! random quote of the day: "The life of every man is a diary in which he means to write one story, and writes another; and his humblest hour is when he compares the volume as it is with what he vowed to make it." --James M. Barrie Sabe

so... uh... day two...... not a walk in the park, but not as bad as i thought it would be. woke up pretty achy (sp?) and have been all day, but i spent a 9 hour vigil on the G-cube.... man, gotta love mario... and i must say.... living on homemade chicken noodle soup and chocolate-banana milkshakes isn't all that bad.... haha. it's so funny.... so far i've lost six pounds because i've hardly been able to eat a thing... but my face is so swollen it looks like i've gained ten... lol... and i've got this icepack wrap thingy that goes around my head that makes me look like a picture of some kid w/ the mumps. it's really funny-looking. tomorrow's mother's day... and mom has no clue what she wants to do... i guess we'll figure it out tomorrow lol. today was waggs's b-day party... and eryk got him welcome to diverse city by tobymac... because i told him to... and... he wrapped it in a wal-mart sack and duct tape. how awesomely hick-ish is that. *yawn* i'm really tired... so i'm gonna take more drugs and go to bed... and.... yeah... i'm quite delerious right now, and i'm not even sure if my typing makes sense. umm... i'm hungry.... but i can't eat.... *sigh* well, um, goodnight.... sleep tight... don't let the bed bugs bite... random quote of the day: "Dad.... my jaw hurts..." --Phillip "YOUR jaw hurts?!" ---me The kid w/ the swollen face

hi.... so, um, this morning i got up at 4:30 to go to indianapolis... and i got all my wisdom teeth taken out. it wasn't too bad, but i almost got sick from swallowing too much blood, but i'm not bleeding anymore... and it's 6:30 and i haven't eaten yet... but i'll be okay... it was kinda funny when i woke up, because the entire bottom half of my face was numb and i was kinda loopy. it hasn't hurt at all yet, but that's cuz i'm on motrin...... and i have all the feeling back in my face except my chin and lower lip, and i'm gettin pretty annoyed because it's been 9 hours and the guy said i should only be numb for 6....... i bet if i went to sleep i'd wake up and it'd be a little better at least, but i've been a chatter box ever since i woke up.... as usual... lol and despite having not eaten, i have like, a ton of energy. i watch LOTR tho... so now i think i'm gonna go dig out my old piano book and see if i can still play the songs... which i probably can't... but oh well. i haven't played iris in months either..... but.... i can't really say it's my fave song anymore, so it doesn't really matter. it still makes the top 10 tho..... holy crepe i just realized i still haven't bought Let Love In... maybe i can talk eryk into getting it for me tomorrow afternoon... yeah... *sigh* at least he's been nice to me today, but that's only because i told him if he made fun of me, then when he got HIS wisdom teeth taken out, i'd give him hell. but he's being nice, so i won't. *laughs* i remember jacob had just gotten his taken out when he went w/ eryk and i to see I, Robot on my 14th b-day. well... um... i'm gonna go get some more motrin. yay, drugs. lol. bye, all....... random quote of the day: When it rains, it pours. Merenwen Luthien Nénharma