I don't know what to do. I absolutely have no idea what to do. Everyone keeps giving me advice, and it helps to know that they're there for me, but when it comes down to it, i have to make the decision on my own, based on how i feel... and i'm scared of what my decision might be. ...and then there's the people that think they know what's going on, but they have no clue. they don't know anything, and they think they know everything. they're driving me crazy. but beside them....... i'm just... stuck. i mean, at first i was on the one side, and then i started thinking that maybe it wouldn't work... and then i got to where i was totally ready to end it all, and then i start again not being sure... and every time i hear that song i start back at the beginning, and...... all of this in one day. i just... part of me wants to just quit, but that would be like giving up... and i don't like that. but on the other hand, i can't just sit here forever like a puppet on a string... GAH! i wish someone could just tell me what to do, but yet so many have done that already and i'm sitting here thinking they're all wrong. they're all partially right... but in the end they're wrong. so it's back to the music... and the dreams... and it's all up to me. that's the worst part. it's all up to me. i've always made my decisions based upon my friends' advice. but this time i can't do that. because if do then i'll screw it up yet again. and..... *deep breath* here i am on the cliff... don't know who's behind me... jumping would mean death... but i know... i'm the only one that knows... but do they follow after? there's too many unanswered questions... random quote of the day: For if you only love those who love you back.... where is the reward in that? Cora