wow. tonight turned out really great. i'm currently slightly buzzed still, but only buzzed, because i chose to not get as completely hammered as i was first planning on. but tonight at rachel and shawn's was really wonderful. i got to see lots of friends that i don't get to see very often, everyone was in a really lovey and affectionate mood, and i was going around hugging everyone. and schmack was there. and was being really flirtatious. he kept talking to me, and his arm kept going around me, and he was being so complimentary... rachel asked me if i was over him yet. and i am, but due to the drama of the other situations in my life, it was just really nice to sort of lose myself in what was, yanno? oh god. rachel was going around shamelessly trying to set me up with her brother. i'm sure he's really nice, but i really hate when people try to set me up with people. things were good, up until the end, when they wrapped themselves up so incredably well. as i was hugging schmack before he left, he pulled back, and kissed me! oh man, i miss kissing him so much. great lips. great smell. wow. so that was nice. kind of a wrap up. and then on my way home, i called mark again, just to wish him a happy 2004. and to hear his voice. and he was in high spirits. and said bye by saying " i love ya, kid". so good to hear. it really makes me think things will be ok. what better way to enter the new year? *** so schmack got online, and i talked to him a bit. he's really depressed, and floundering. poor baby. so i tried to say what i could to make him feel better, and i once again reminded him how much i care about him. but i finally managed to cheer him up a bit by showing him this http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=boo-urns . and also i found two missed calls on my phone from mark, so i called him back, and we ended up talking for awhile, and it was really nice. he thanked me for loving him. thats probably the best possible thing he could say to me. he said i honestly meant alot to him. he also told me to call him tomorrow. yay. i have my friend back.