oh jesus christ......i'm losing it so much. not only have i been really depressed this weekend, but other things are going nuts too. i've cut up my arm and shoulder and hand and stuff. ugh. i'm pissed off at one of my best friends, and pissed off a few other people. but worst of all i think i have a crush on Andy. i swore to myself this would NEVER happen. we almost kissed several times tonight. oh god. what the fuck.