well, tonight was better than i expected i guess. i had pretty dim hopes. but work was good, even though andy is fucking ENGAGED... he was still kinda flirty, so that was nice. afterwards, i went to the coffeehouse, and saw Mark cuddling with a girl. I assumed it was Nikki (the stripper). at first it took alot of energy not to feel wretched, but she's actually quite cute. a little on the insanely skinny side, and she fits his taste in looking like a little girl, but all in all, cute. despite my emotional response, my aesthetic sense says they look good together. and...well he looked happy. so... considering that, i didn't feel as horrible as i expected i would. i mean, i know that this probably won't work out, because he's obviously set himself up for failure again, but... seeing him happy with someone is good. i think taking him this visably out of my grasp is another step in me getting over him. talked to mackie when i got home, it was nice, again. we talked about times we missed each other when we weren't speaking. turns out he bought me a valentine's day gift... i'm all gushy excited because i hate valentine's day and that gesture means alot to me. we are planning on having a mini party for anna for her bday. this could be fun. however, our chat was cut short cuz anna called... and he went off to her. i mean, i guess i understand considering she's more available late nights and stuff. but i remember times when i'd sneak out all the time for us to hang out. i just don't know where i fit in. my place in the grand scheme of any things right now is kind of in question, out of phase, if you will. today was just odd. tiemann was having a horrible day, so me and eliz made him one of our crazy collage extravaganza cards. he was cheered by it. i'm also almost done with my vase, i really hope it turns out. quote of the evening: "FUCK YOU little bird!" -landis