ya really wanna know how i feel right now? well its like this. i hate myself. i lost you and i hate it cuz its all my fault. i feel like i did everything wrong and i should hate myself for it, so i do. idk. i say fuck everything now cuz i know nothing is ever going to work again.. ever. you basically said it to my face. idk. you lead me on and then dont talk to me for like 3 days. wtf is that about. and you need to STOP FORCING ME TO LIKE HIM. i dont and dont want to. i dont want anyone. i just want someone i can rely on that i can call my bff and that makes me just light up. the only guy that really does that would be tito cuz hes just an awesome bff. i dont know man. we seem to have gotten off to a bad start and it sucks cuz i dont feel like im being a good friend to you. this suck balls soooo bad. arg. i just want it all to go away. i want everything to be ok for once in my life. why cant that happen? did i really screw up my life THAT bad? help me. tell me im ok. do SOMETHING. life is just getting annoying now. i mean the only thing that makes me happy any more, are my friends. its not even my own family that makes me happy. idk. help me with something. anything. i need a advice, truth, a hug. ahhhhhhh im going insane thinking about this. and im always asked if im ok and i just say ya cuz i dont want to complain like i do on here. its just not worth it. im so sad. i drove past your house tonight and she was like "awwwwe" and im like yea i wish. i dont knowwwwwwwwwwww. do what you want. you dont care. me