Don't think that no one loved you because they've turned away Don't feel they didn't care for you because they couldn't stay Don't damn the world for not returning the love you feel you've given Don't hate the one you were yearning for because he couldn't make a commitment just think of him as an experience & think how much you've grown think of him as the sacred prince who placed you on the throne think of all the times together feeling closer since you're apart think of your plans of now & forever & hold them in your heart. So I stole that from Mal's Diary b/c I think its appropriate for someone that I say so many times how much I regret being with them and getting more involved with them than friends. I'm even regretting now getting involved, but this quote makes me re-think all that. He was really good to me and I guess I can't let go of that and him b/c I'm scared I won't find that again. I know he reads this and I don't really care. Our friendship hasn't been what I want it to be. I feel like i'm just put on hold all the time. And i put forth all the effort to be friends...so is it worth it? I think you're the only person I have questioned whether or not i should keep haning around with. EVeryone else is pretty much black and white...and I know what i should do with them. But you're so complicated! I want you in my life b/c you're like a second big brother that i know i can count on to beat the shit out of someone if i need it. and you say you care about me...sometimes you don't show it...but when you do...it means a lot to me *esp. when you're considerate of my feelings* there's so much more i wish i could say to you in person but you won't have that...and i can't afford to express that much emotion. so there's about a quarter of my feelings...maybe the rest will come out in a later entry. Who knows. You know who you are. ((lacy)) *The part I think is the most important in relating to this person and my life: Don't damn the world for not returning the love you feel you've given Don't hate the one you were yearning for because he couldn't make a commitment **