I am depressed once more.. and it hurts like fuck. Today I have had alot of pressure to fish out to you guys. so here it goes. My day started out boring...really boring.. I mean I was so tired.. and no one was there to help me.. so I had gotten hyper in reaction.. I hate it when I get hyper.. I am REALLY hyper.. I yell and rant and wave.. and everything... but yeah... people finally got there. I saw meh friends and I went to first period.. where it was all fine.. I sat there on the bench in physical fitness staring at the three guys I had a crush on.... and talking to meh friend who I met there.. she is awsome to talk to.. her sarcasm is hilarious. but anywho... the three guys.. chase, anthony.. and some other guy who is in 11th grade.. but yeah.. I was paying more attention to chase and anthony because they were talking to each other (weird..didnt know they talked)... but... they were talking... and I was staring at them and talking to meh friend when chase yells to me.."are you gay?" I know he wasnt asking to be nice.. because he picked on me a little... but yeah.. I told him I was straight and left it at that... my other friend HAD to tell him I was to be a big ass bitch and she ruined everything!!...cause now anthony and chase know I am gay... but thats only the beginning... second period... anthony site RIGHT infront of me.. *deep sigh* but yeah.. I like him alot.. I stare at him constantly when I am not asleep.. he didnt do anything to meh so I was okay... then I got to lunch.. normal... I thought justin was ignoring me and that made me a little sad.. but I talked to him tonight and from what he said.. he said I was really really happy... I left really fast from lunch and went to third period.. where I have chase again... I had gotten there... and he started making fun of me.. he called me faggot.. and asked me if I still cut and all that shit infont of people... he would kick my chair and anything possible to get me pissed... I like I usually do.. just ignored it at the time.. but yeah.. it didnt help... chase just did far worse that I dont even want to say... but yeah.. that really hurt me and no one even knew... we were heading to the library... as in we.. I ment the class.. got in there and chase called me faggot more frequently... and his friend justin (justin is a good aquantence of mind.. I gave him some money these last few days) but back to it.. justin walked by and saw what chase was doing... and told him to shut up.. chase was all "I wasnt talking to you! I was talking to the faggot" and justin said that he didnt care he wanted him to shut up... (this night I wrote him a thank you letter he will recieve on monday)... but yeah... then I got to fourth... I had nothing to do because I was so alone.... I wanted to cry because I am a weak ass retard.. but I didnt... I got home... and plenty of people on the internet were calling me faggy and everything.. I just blew up......and started to cut..... I want to end it there,....because this paragraph has gotten BIG!