so jeff could and would only understand the situation between someone else right now. so im not even going to waste my time writing it.... thanks sam for showing mom my arm. you can see the lines still but its not as bad. i dont care if its there all my life. my mom hates one of my good friends.. she just hates everything about me. i feel ignored. pretty much by everyone thats part of my family. i dont feel as close to sam as shes not here anymore my dad will never call and apologize for making me feel like shit.. and feeling like a failure.my mom just wakes up and puts me down. it seems as if everyone thinks im the most depressed person in the world.... its sort of weird. makes me think that people are only being nice cause they feel bad. --I dream of rain I dream of gardens in the desert sand I wake in vain I dream of love as time runs through my hand I dream of fire Those dreams that tie two hearts that will never die And near the flames The shadows play in the shape of the mans desire This desert rose Whose shadow bears the secret promise This desert flower No sweet perfume that would torture you more than this And now she turns This way she moves in the logic of all my dreams This fire burns I realize that nothings as it seems I dream of rain I dream of gardens in the desert sand I wake in vain I dream of love as time runs through my hand I dream of rain I lift my gaze to empty skies above I close my eyes The rare perfume is the sweet intoxication of love I dream of rain I dream of gardens in the desert sand I wake in vain I dream of love as time runs through my hand Sweet desert rose Whose shadow bears the secret promise This desert flower No sweet perfume that would torture you more than this Sweet desert rose This memory of hidden hearts and souls This desert flower This rare perfurme is the sweet intoxication of love