Sunday: 4/2- Oh my god... *Sniffs and coughs* I think I'm dying. Not literally but it feels like it. I'm sick as a dog. I dont know what I have either. My throat feels like its bleeding. I've coughed it raw. So every know and then there's bits of blood. My nose is clogged, I'm throwing up everything I'm eating. It kills me to drink water. Swallowing saliva burns my throat, my visions blurry. My head is killing me. Everytime I stand up I get really dizzy. I either have to sit down or crawl everywhere. *Unenthusiasticly* Woo... I watched some of Memoirs of a Geisha. I dont know if we still have it Amanda called right in the middle of it. So, I havent finished it yet. I'm going to her house tonight. She insists on me coming over. I'm like WTF?! I'm sick. She wants me to hang out with her before she goes over to her Grandmas house in Madras till Thursday. I feel bad for her. She's gonna be stuck with all her little evil cousins and her siblings. Poor Manders. We basically layed around all day. I think I got her sick. Monday: 4/3- My temperature is 103.1. I couldnt tell Amanda's mom, Greg, or Danielle because none of them were home. They were either at work, or getting things for the trip. Amanda has to babysit her little cousins and siblings. Oh my god they're monsters! Jebus. Amanda has a 99.2 temperature. Amanda's cousins Michael and Noah were being evil. They were screaming and jumping and making noises. Amanda went off on them. Josiah was being annoying too. She sent him to his room. We sat down and went through upcoming shows/concerts in the newspaper. Nine Inch Nails is coming to town on May 27th. Amanda's stepdad Greg offered to take us to see NIN. Tickets are 50 dollars. We're saving up. I'm getting money for my birthday and so is Manda. When Greg finally got home, he drove me home and I layed down. My mom freaked because of my temperature and shoved about 4 different medicines down my throat. Woo. I've lost my computer till May 2nd. So, I'll be back soon. Tuesday: 4/4- Day three of being sick. I havent thrown up today, so its going pretty well. My nose is even stuffier. I've been coughing a lot though. My poor throat. It burns!! I watched TV all day. Elizabeth called about 90 times today. Okay, if I dont answer the phone the first 50 times, dont call back. I'm still pissed at her. I dont really want to talk to her. Everytime she calls, all she talks about is Green Day. I'm not gonna spend 3 hours on the phone listening to her rant about Green Day. Its bad enough listening to Cecilia rant about Fall Out Boy. Sigh. I am tired. Good night. Wednesday: 4/5- Day four of being sick... I feel icky. Whatever I have, its not going away. I've been vomiting and coughing and hacking. Then my mom gave me chores to do. She got me icky gatorade too. Its Fruit Punch meaning it tastes horrible. Then I have Reeses which are good. Then icky "Cherry" flavored medicine. I watched more TV. Elizabeth called once today. The first and only time she called my mom picked up the phone and told her I was sick and didnt want to talk to anyone. I think Amanda's getting what I'm getting. She called from her grandma's house today. I learned that she's allergic to Juniper Trees. She's coming home tomorrow. Good. Spring Break has not been fun so far. Thursday: 4/6- Day 5 of being sick. IT WONT GO AWAY!! ACK! I got to lounge around today...again. I took some asprin cause I got an uber horrible headache. I fell asleep watching comedy central last night around 10 and woke up around 2 am listening to a repetitive Girls Gone Wild infomercial thing. You can imagine the odd dreams I had last night. Yeah. I was on the couch watching TV, and my mom leans over the railing, yelling "TURN DOWN THE TV!!! AND STOP COUGHING SO LOUD!! YOU'RE GONNA WAKE SEAN UP!!" Then he starts crying cause she's yelling and I got blamed for it. All I have to say is "WHAT THE FUCK???" Now. Moving on. After being a bitch all morning, my mom finally comes down stairs trying to make a deal with me. She starts this conversation off by saying she's going to get me minutes for my phone. Ok. I'm listening when the word minutes pops up. If I want these minutes, I need to clean the kitchen, living room, and bathroom. Then I have to sweep and vaccuum. Oh. Then I get to do HER and MY STEPDADS and SEANS and SKYES laundry. This is 25 dollars worth of minutes. Even if I dont want the minutes, I still have to clean and vaccuum and sweep. I wouldnt have to do laundry though. I kinda want these minutes. Kayla text messaged me checking to see if I was alive Oo. Yeah. So when I get the minutes (Tomorrow) I'm gonna text her back. Oh yeah. Today was Desi's birthday. Happy Birthday Desi. Friday: 4/7- Day 6 of being sick...I'm feeling a teeny bit better. I'm still hacking and coughing and I still have a headache, but yeah. I've been texting with Kayla all day. It's been fun. I called her and Michael. We spoke. Words were used. That is all. Saturday: 4/8- TODAY I HAD AN ARTISTIC BURST OF INSPIRATION!!! Sunday: 4/9- I am not your slave. I am not your servant I am not your personal shopper I am not a babysitter I am not a therapist I am not some one with a sympathetic ear. I am not a saint I am not perfect I cant do everything I am not super kid I am a student. I am a teenager I am depressed. I am a liar. I am a bitch I am a sinner I do have issues. I do need help. I am your daughter. Now. I hope she reads this. I had more artistic bursts of inspiration. That is all. Monday: 4/10- We did more poetry in block class. Lets not forget about Culture fair. Icky. Very icky. Anyways... Drama was interesting. We had to make to do lists. We also revised our scripts. At lunch Sam gave me a copy of Amanda's The Offspring cd. Its awesome. YAY FOR PRETTY FLY FOR A WHITE GUY!!! The rest of the day was blah. BLAH I TELL YOU! Tuesday: 4/11- Poetry, Culture Fair, Breakfast Serials, and Constitution revision. Woo. Drama stupid fucking Anthony scheduled us for a performance in front of the class. That bastard. We weren't even ready. I had to hurry up and run to the library to fix the scripts. When I got back, they were already in the room. Just sitting there. Then they blamed the bad on me because I was off printing out THEIR scripts. What the fuck. Just what the fuck. We learned that since the outbreak of the Norovirus in elderly homes, we aren't allowed to get our own lunches today. So there was a line from the cafeteria to the double doors at the front of the school. Tis bullshit. Pure fucking bullshit. At lunch everyone was bugging me at lunch...CAN YOU NOT TELL I'M SICK??? LEAVE ME THE FUCK ALONE! ACK! I got pissed and started yelling at people. I dont regret it. I got more homework from Algebra. The WASL's coming. System overload. Then reviews and quizzes in Science. Ugh... We played side line basketball in Gym. We also had intramurals today. Environmental club. We put the mental in environmental. Stephanie and I played cheesy spies. The teachers were giving us funny looks. Jeni (Skittlez) told me that Mike, Darrells friend that likes me, wanted to take me out to dinner. Wow. Just wow. Manda hasn't called yet. O.O Its ze end of ze world. Sunday: 4/16- I dont want to be here. I have WASL's, major amounts of homework, chores, and other problems of my own. I want to run away. Or just die. Either way its all good. I have no one to talk to about my problems. There's no one who does what I do because of my reasons. No its not because its too much, no its not because I want to die. Its because I want people to understand I guess. I want them to see what they're doing to me. Its not fun. I kinda want to die now. Actually, running away sounds more appealing. I can still have a life without my mom or Cayce. I can have a better life. I have 22 cuts on both arms. I hate this. I hate what I feel. I hate myself for losing him. I want out. Monday: 4/17- We did WASL prep test today. It was really boring. Then we studied Tanka's. Those are Chinese/Japanese poems of observations. They're kinda like Haiku's, only longer. In Drama we didn't really do anything. We had a substitute. Lunch was boring. Algebra was the same. Choir. I just didn't want to be there. I dont feel like singing anymore. Science, Parisa and Jake kept asking me what was wrong. I showed Amanda the cuts on my wrist. I saw the old ones on hers. It was odd. I'd never thought of her to be one to cut. It was very odd. Gym was boring. I got home and my mom told me that my phone line'll be up on Friday. YAY. The number is: 1-360-574-6269. YAY!! Tuesday: 4/18- We started WASL today. It sucked. It was easy, but it sucked. I finished an hour and a half early. I read and was bored. Then I went to lunch. I spent three periods with my block teacher. That was a fucking boring first half of the day. At lunch I slapped Tommy. I walked up to me, yelling at me saying "You have serious problems" and calling me a bitch. I should have backhanded him. Fucking bastard. I went to Algebra and got more homework because we're on a really messed up schedule. I have Algebra everyday this week and all my other classes every other day. Grr. From Algebra I went to Drama. That was interesting. It was funny as hell though. We did improv. We basically do an hour long Who's Line Is It Anyway thing. It was awesome. Afterwards, to block class I went. That completed my five periods with Mr. Greco. We played pictionary. I had to draw "Walking The Dog" with a yo yo. That was amusing. We had to write more Tanka's too. That sucked. I wrote about my hatred of bees. Mr Greco made me read it to the class. Yeah. Got a few laughs from that. Then myself, Alex, Taylor, and Jeff discussed the differences between school and prison. There aren't many. I got my board for Culture Fair (AKA dumb research thing where I have to call my dad and ask about my Scotch-Irish background.) and went to Environmental club. We wrote rules then went outside. We walked around the track and down to Whipple Creek. Then we picked up trash. When we were going around the track I looked over to see Desi, Shayla, Alanna, Jo, and Josie at the Chinook playground. The names listed were Amanda's siblings. They were running over "KATEY KATEY KATEY!! I WANNA HUG!" I was laughing cause almost 2 year old Josie is running behind them going "KITTY! KITTY! HUG HUG!!" it was cute. I had to go back to "Environmental Headquarters" after that. Then came home. I ate a piece of ham and a hershey kiss before Manders called. We talked before I called Garrett. It was a short lived conversation. Then Manders called back saying she lost Josie. She said Danielle told her that she didnt have Josie. And Amanda's sobbing running around the block looking for her. Then we find out that Danielle had her the whole time and lied to Manders. And then Greg grounded her for being "irresponsible". You do not do that to someone. And then I learn that everyones dads/stepdads are being asses. ALL OF YOU NEED A SWIFT KICK TO THE BALLS!!! GRR! Then my mom comes home and is being a bitch. It never ends really. I hate my mom. I swear to god I want to run away and never ever come back. Just to disappear. That sounds nice. Real nice. I snuck online today. I'll see you all May 2nd. And my story will be updated. Wednesday: 4/19- More WASL today. GRRR!!! I HATE THE WASL! ITS EVIL!! And I still finished early. It was Reading 2. We did Reading 1 yesterday. Alex or "bo bo" keeps telling me that I'm gonna fail the WASL because I'm going too fast. I finished the same time as Sam and Amanda, I think I'll do fine on the WASL. After that was lunch. Stevie got lunch detention all week and half way through next week because Ms. Church is a bitch. God damn is she a bitch. All she does is follow Stevie around and nag at him. He didn't want to sing a song in choir cause it was uber religious and Ms. Church gave him lunch detentions. Then to Algebra I went because I have it all week. I got homework because Mrs.Mclean doesnt want me to fall behind. Grr. Its WASL week. I dont want to have homework. BTW, if I didnt mention it before, WASL stands for: Washington Assessment of Student Learning. Ew. Then I had choir. We sang. Amanda was tired so I just sat in the chairs with her. I dont feel like singing in Choir anymore. There's nothing great about our song choice this time. So yeah. The suckiness continues. Science we had to do a stupid ass lab. Meaning we had to walk all around the room testing things. There was a Wasp in the room and Parisa freaked out. Eric, a fucking evil bastard, thinks he's gonna kill it by hitting it with a yard stick. -.- It only got more pissed. We eventually got it out. OH and I stole Jakes Fender Beanie cause I can. I threatened to put it in the sink then I hid. That was fun. Gym we walked the track. I gave Tommy my new number. Got home and called Roxie. We had a 4 to 5 hour phone conversation. Thursday: 4/20- Math WASL 1. Icky. Again, finished early. Alex still thinks I'm gonna fail the WASL. When we finished we talked about Journey, NIN, BeeGees, and Led Zepplin. That was interesting. I didnt know Mr.Greco listened to our types of music. It was a great revelation. At lunch, myself, Sam and Amanda sat out on the grass on our coats and talked. It was amusing I suppose. But then people started coming over. I really hate telling other friends to go away, but sometimes, you just have to. Then Elizabeth was being very immature about. She's really starting to piss me off as of late. Then Tommy came over. And I went GRR. Algebra = 4(Doom+Homework+PMSy Katey)+(Student divided by Confusion). Just Grr. In Drama we played the Dating Game. That was also amusing. Elizabeth was teacher for a day. Then I went to block class where we had to do a review, turn in proposals for culture fair, and read the Breakfast Serials from the newspaper. We got to talk for like an hour after that. Mr.Greco says that we're not going to be studying or doing much work since its WASL week. When I got home, I called Roxie and talked with her for a bit. Then I called Sam. We talked for even longer. I think I lost my ring. ANYWAYS we talked about reviving Remonaeia. She thinks thats a great idea. It'll be a lot better if we can recruit more Shadow Clan people than just Michael. Then I had to clean my room. OH *Does a dance* MY PHONE LINE WAS HOOKED UP TODAY!!