I'm to easily amused. I'm rolling a ring around on my computer desk. I don't know why but it makes me smile. I really like this ring. Except it especially makes me miss Christa because she's the one who bought it. I don't know why but my envy ring makes me think of a lot of people. Maybe because I envy a lot of people over little things. I was really tired last night. When Chambers called me a stalker I took it seriously. I feel bad. He says he isn't mad at me but that's not true because he isn't talking to me at all. But I'm not going IM him first. I don't want to force him to talk to me. I think I force a lot of people to talk to me sometimes. I wish I weren't like that.... Last night Teresa said that a lot of my friends seem to be "not so nice". Which really isn't true. Maybe it's just that I'm "not so nice" to them. Because I love my friends and I'm really lucky to have friends like them. I've lucked out in a lot of stuff. I lucked out that I'm not really ugly or really fat and that I'm able to get good grades and that my mom cares about me so much. And that I've had the chance to move around a lot and make a lot of friends So I was thinking...a lot of people complain about how they are fat, when they are a lot skinnier than me or that they are ugly when they are a lot prettier than me. I don't know why you would want to say that. I mean, sometimes I hate myself, but I -always- love me more than I hate me. And I really don't wish I was skinnier or prettier or more popular. Because I like the way I am most of the time. There's a few things I would change, like the fact that I was so spoiled when I was little or the fact that school always came easily to me and I had to show off about it. And it makes me really sad when people that I really care about say how they are ugly or fat or a freak because, they could be the ugliest, fattest, freak on the planet and I would still love them for them. Honestly. Sometimes it scares me that people can like other people for their looks or their popularity. What if someone only liked me for my image. What if someone was only using me to get something they wanted. That's why I feel so lucky to have the friends that I do that care about me, not the way I look and I really just want them to know that I care -so- much about them and I don't want them to not be happy with who they are and that to me they are the beautiful people in this world. And even if your parents tell you that you are fat and that you need to exercise and all that, you seriously don't because you are the most beautiful girl I know Whitter-bug. I don't want you to change one bit. Ever. Think about it... K sorry if I bored you with that but I felt like I had to write it. Bye.