ever have one of those days where u dont feel anything? i guess i could say im sad, when cleary i am a whirlpool of emotion. all i feel is bullshit. i feel sad, depressed, empty, dead, angry, jealous, hurt, everything except for the happy ones. i guess its just easier to say "sad" when i really dont know. my best friend and i used to do EvErYtHiNg together. like her mom gave me rides home from school and whenever we had the oppurtunity to go somewhere, i was already with them so no wait. now that it is summer, there are no school rides and therefore no random trips to where-ever. i have not seen sam in like a month (not including today, but she left anyway) its so depressing really. like now all of a sudden she is allowed to date, me not. and its like another chance for us not to see eachother. DAMMIT!!! i havent been to ventura (place we like always go together) in three months, at least. so sad. im stuck at work watching sam do all the things we used to do together. and to add insult to injury, i was at home, and sam's mom calls me. the only times she calls me is when she wants us all to do something. o, the excitement i was feeling. well no. it turns out sam left her skirt here and needs it for HER DATE TONIGHT!!!! ARGH! can i die now? honestly. as if it isnt bad enough that i never see or talk to her, and am grounded, and stuck at work, and sam gets to do all those fun things still.....but now, this day where i feel like incredible shit, she has a date. wow.