it's friday night and i feel alright.. the parties here on the westside :) LMAO, um great tunes from the 90's? this week went by so fassssst. had some great times. going to see havana nights tonight with brenda brion jen and some of brion's friends. no one else wants to go with us because there not cool. but i guess that's there porogative. (sp?) erica and brenda were making fun of me because my pants are too big around my ass/ waist/ crotch area. well ya know what FUCK YOU. i need butt pads :) I CANT FUCKING WAIT UNTIL TOMORROW NIGHT! i hope everything works out though. english was suprising. jessy came up to me and told me she felt bad and that she's going to give my pants back monday, i thought that was really sweet actually. i've been sick of fighting this battle for awhile now but i feel like if i make a decision everyone's going to be disapointed in me because i'm too "soft". but fighting is nottt my thing anymore. i want everyone to love me like usual :) so i guess me and her are pretty cool now, she seems a litttttle bit hostile but who wouldn't in that situation.. i'd like things to go back to seminormal. but a little more compassion// i guess what i'm trying to say is that despite my bitching on here i missed her. hey, you try having a friend for 3 years and realizing you don't get along and having to let them go. it kinda sucks. i still don't know what to do. so 9th period i felt like shit and was upset because i'm so damnnnn confused. i wish i didn't have feelings. i'd love to be one ball of apathetic matter. i over analyze every single thing that happens in my life. e v e r y t h i n g. i want good things to happen but i dont want to get close because fear stands in the way. i think of the worst. i ramble. this entry is such a ramble. MANNN. my hair was hella curly today. people are nicer to me when my hair is curly. ya know why i think? because it's my natural hair.. lol that makes sense to me though. I WASN'T WEARING MY FACADE TODAY!!!!!!! :) hahhaaa.. brion were you wearing your flask though?.. well i'm glad certain people liked it today.. :-O sending chills up & down my spine. lemmie get mine you get yours