i dont get myself. i have to be the most retarted person alive, and it gets so annoying. i have to overanalyze evvverything, thus making me depressed and totally negative. i just dont understand why things cant be perfect? or at least damn near it. ive been really down ever since about my birthday on monday, and i have no idea what from. okay well i have a pretty good idea but i havent told anyone. and thats pretty surprising for myself since i cant really ever hold in my feelings. but im working on holding them in so that i dont ruin anything, which is my biggest fear. last night i was about to EXPLODE from not telling anyone, but i guess after you just cry for awhile you feel better until the next time. i seriously dont know what i even expect from people. but the end result is never a good one..