alone again, i'm sitting here wishing my life will change, everyday its another thing, same old shit just on a different day. I try so hard but nothing matters I can't hide behind this smile forever its killing me. I'm not actually alone but I am, I am so alone. I feel like I have lost my connection, I have a boyfrind who I love and family and friends but I feel like I am so disconnected from this world. I can be happy and so sad and alone at the same time. I don't know what is happening to me. It just this moment I feel like this by 2morrow ill be fine, but it just seems like when it rains it pours. For once in my life i just want something to work out, just this once. Let something good happen, I feel like its always about someone els what they want what they need but what about me? Don't i deserve something? it's summer im on my break form college i'm working 2 jobs doubles just about everyday. just this once i just wish i could have just one good day.