The big bang theory. What tard thought of that? Oh, yeah, a long time ago, in a galaxy far far away, darth vader blew up a star with his death star, and that explosion created life. Seriously. I did. All those little exploded particle thingies formed our muscles, bones, brain, and the nerves that connected all our senses to that brain that was some how created, capable to register everything that was happening. There was some other uber-imposible stuff that it did too, but I need a few minutes to figure out HOW it actualy happened. And they wonder why kids say school teaches them useless things. I saw an awesome comercial, last year I think it was. It showed some kid sitting in the middle of his room lighting cherry bombs. Then naturaly, his parents wonder what's going on, so they open to door to his room and are like "O.O SON! WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!" "Trying to make a little brother." Man, the look on the kids face when he says that is so...I don't know, but it was a damn cool comerical. So yeah, the comercial was the funny story thing for today.

Okay ladies and germs. Today I'm going to remember all the highlights of last year! Well, the year started off just bad enough to be anoying. It got a hell of a lot better though. Table of contents: (Don't highlight it until after you've read the whole entry. Also, I'm kind of screwed if I ever change my background to anything but white. But meh, who would read this far back after I've changed the bgcolor. Or, if you're not in the mood to read an entry, just highlight it, and get the sumamry of my year.) -January. I got expeled from my online school. -Later in January. They let me back in, with a two week suspension. -Febuary. Deanna's friend pretty much forced me to ask Deanna out. (Not that I didn't want to, just that few people are good at asking people out ;)) -March. I got Deanna and another one of her friends banned from msn. -A few days after she got banned. Went to Em' AMDEC party. -April. I called Deanna for the first time (1. Phones are evil. 2. I was fucking terrified of calling her house, due to her parents. I'm even more scared now that they actualy hate me) to apoligize. -The summer. Not much happened. Just pretty much spent the summer in misery at my cottage. -Octoberish. Skating/Gym day started up again. So I was able to see Deanna three times a week (I saw her at church too. But i was at the cottage pretty much all fucking summer) Not that we talked much then... -Early December. Deanna had been baby sitting some little girl and her brother for a while. She gets the idea to come on msn at their house! I was so freakin' happy! (You may remember my friggin' long post on dec 7) -Late December. I went to T.O. with Matt, and met Val. January Well, I made a website back in December that had basic student information, what courses they were doing, etc. It also had the AMDEC (amdec is my online school) logo at the top, so they were pissed about that too. The principal said the school might sue me XD But the principal is effin' awesome. I really respect her. The school board wanted to expel me, and they did, but three days later The Hazardous one (Her last name is "Hazard", so yeah) had managed to convince them to just give me a 2 week suspension. So yeah, she pwns. In June, a bunch of the amdec students got together to get to meet each other, as well as their teachers (since it's all online, you don't get to actualy see each other, or anything) and the Hazardous one was talking with my mom, and my mom calls me over, and the Hazardous one was making all these jokes about me hiding from her and stuff. Yeah, she's cool. We have a new principal now (Mr. Ash) and he's pretty cool too. Oh! And the techies (It's an online school, techies keep the school running smoothly) remember me from "the incident"! I was talking to one a few weeks ago, and he's like "Oh, you're that kid who made that website arn't you?!" So yeah, geek pride kicked in! XD Febuary Ah Febuary. Gotta love the febuary chat logs. Okay, I'd known Deanna had liked me for like 5 months, and visa versa. Well, on Valentines day (I still friggin hate that day. I want to just sleep through it every year. Ewww, giving valentines to girls. =P But seriously, giving valentines suck.) Deanna slept over at he friend's house (Andrea). -- Actualy, it was the day before Valentines day, but it was past midnight, so yeah. -- Anyway, Andrea had been trying to get us together for like...a while. Well, she knew enough that I wouldn't have enough guts to ask Deanna out in real life, so she had devised a scheme specificaly for when Deanna slept over, and I was online. (Actualy, that's not true, I just think everything's a scheme) Anyway, while Deanna was off watching TV or something, Andrea convinced me to just say something cheesy, like "Will you be my Valentine" or something when Deanna got back on. So, when Deanna got back on, I actualy did it. (*gasp*) She said yes (*double gasp*) and we lived hapily ever after (My ass). So that's what *started* it. Then after that, other stuff happened, and yeah. Anyway, that's how it started. March Year started off like crap. (Getting expeled). Year got better. w00t right? Damn right w00t! I had a g/f! But for how long? Well, now I know that it's been about a year, but from march to December, I wasn't sure. k, epilogue. Or prologue. I'm not sure. Whichever one comes before chapter one: Deanna had introduced me to her friend, Jessie, over msn, back in like, October of 2003. Jessie was pretty cool, except that her music sucked. So naturaly, I had to fix that. Back near the begining of Febuary, I made her some cds, with like LP, simple plan, eminem, etc on it. (She was listening to Relient K and stuff, so I doubt she would like Static-X or anything. Just some standard mainstream stuff.) Well, she ended up liking Eminem so much, that she wanted me to make her a cd with nothing but Eminem on it (I made a bunch of mix cds to test which bands she liked) so I did. (I threw in some tupac at the end of the cd too) It had songs on it like "Kill you", "As the world turns", "Fight music" (D12), and other messed up stuff like that. Anyway, wouldn't ya' know it, her parents found her cds. Now that wouldn't get you banned from msn right? "omg, eminem! We blame MSN!" No. Anyway, they asked her where she got the cds, and she said some guy at camp gave them to her, and they believed her. Then they kind of went crazy, and took apart her room, took away her "punk stuff", read through her chat logs, etc. Fuckin' chat logs. Man I hate them. I like them on my computer, but I hate them on Jessie's computer. Anyway, they went through her hours of conversations with me. Before they read them, they were like "wow, that kid's an angel." I even re-did her dad's buisness site for 20 bucks. (He had paid some other guy like 100 bucks for an uber-crappy site) Afterwards they were horrified with me. "Stay away from our daughter, or we'll fucking kill you". Not that intense, but whatever. Then a day or two later (while still going through her stuff) they found out Jessie had cut herself. They blamed me for that. I'd been told by a lot of her friends that I was a big influence on her. But man... I didn't even know I was an influence on her, since, well, when you meet someone and you start influencing them, you don't really know how they were before you influence them, so you can't really tell if you're influencing them. At fist they just made her block me on her msn, but they started reading through her other chat convos, and were like "screw this, no internet for you". What the friggin' hell. You don't just take away someone's internet. That's just wrong. Her parents ended up giving my parents the chat logs too. So I got in lots of trouble too. There's no way in fucking hell I let them into my computer though. I mean, they wouldn't be able to figure any of it out. But yeah. My computer is my club house. No girls/adults aloud XD So yeah, my parents found out a lot about my online life. (Not everything) And, if some of you talk to me on msn, you might see I sudenly go away, then come back after a while, or something. That's 'cause one of my parents has come down or somehting, and I've hidden everything I'm not supposed to be doing. =P MSN, forums, php files, irc, winamp, bit torrent, etc. So yeah, I got in a lot of trouble from that too. Now that's not too bad right. Jessie has a semi-social life, and I can use my uber-1337 skills (aka programs other people have made) to keep doing whatever the hell I want, and my parents won't know. Only bad part here is the trust lost between me and my parents, jessie and her parents, and me and jessie's parents. Well, yeah, me not being able to talk to Jessie on msn anymore is bad too. I mean, the only way I really got to see Deanna that wasn't in Church, Gym day, or skating, was when we would plan something with Jessie. Anyway, THEN her parents sugested that Deanna's parents read Deanna's freaking chat logs. -- Wow, right when I typed that, my cousin, who is playing DDR in the other room, just went "arg". k, anyway, yeah, her parents went through her chat logs, and she got in tons of trouble, and her parents found out about "us", and found out she cut herself ONCE, and other random crap. Okay, I just went and ate supper, so I have totaly lost my train of thought. Anyway, let's wrap this up: (Too bad I didn't know Mike back then. I would have blamed it all on him XD) Anyway, some of you may have noticed that I don't talk much in real life. To anyone. So basicaly, when Deanna lost MSN, communication was kind of cut off with her. That was...Blah. A few days after she got banned Okay, this actualy happened like, two days BEFORE I got Jessie and Deanna in trouble. However, I'm too lazy to scroll up and change my index to say "before". Anyway, I went to Emily's AMDEC party. That was awesome. I was either wedged in between a chair and a cabnit, giggling. Or off in Emily's room with Miranda, Jon, and Joanna. I don't really remember much about the party, except that it was awesome. (It was a social situation where I didn't have to do anything! How kick-ass is that =P) I hope Em does it again this year! Hopefully, the APC won't need to get involved this time, and get the party aproved ;) April Well, after not really being able to actualy apoligize to Deanna in real life, Andrea told me that Deanna was home alone, and what her phone number is, and told me to call her. Man, I was sweating before I even touched the phone. Anyway, I called, she answered, I apoligized, and asked if she was mad, she said it was fine, she wasn't mad, and it was her fault for not deleting the chat logs. Well. It's not her fault. I didn't delete her chat logs that one time I went into her house. I could have, but I didn't. Therefore it's just as much my fault as hers. However, I'm the reason her parents went through the chat logs. If I had been able to talk, I would have said that. Instead I simply said "No, it's not your fault, it's mine", and back and forth like that 5ish times. That took up about 40 seconds of the 20 minute phone call. FUCK YOU AWKWARD SILENCE. FUCK YOU IN-ABILITY TO TALK. It's like I'm having a stroke or something. I can't put my thoughts into words. So yeah, 19:20 of awkard silence. Then, since it was on a cordless phone, you know how there's a little "on/off" button near your ear usualy? I acidently hit that button (I always seem to hit that button whenever I'm using a cell/cordless phone. I don't know why. I seem to be the only one that does that) and hung up on her. Here's what happened (Timestamps are assuming the call started at 00:00 (midnight)): [00:20:00]: *accidentaly hangs up* "AW FUCK." *continues swearing spasm for 15 seconds*. [00:20:15]: *calls back* [00:20:20]: *Deanna picks up* "Hello" [00:20:22]: "Hi, sorry about that, I hit a random button." [00:20:25]: "It's okay." [00:20:26]: "Okay". [00:20:27]: *silence* [00:20:28]: *silence* [00:20:29]: *silence* [00:20:30]: *silence* There ya' go. Conversation done in 30 seconds. More like 15 if you exclude my swearing fit. Only 14:30 left to fill. After 14:30 she said she had to go, and I went back to my basement with the computer, feeling totaly pissed off with myself. Uber-pathetic social life eh? This was one of my "big moments of the year 2k4". -_- The summer The summer. Man I hate the summer. I have so many happy memories of the summer. That was before I knew the computer. Now the summer fucking sucks. It's just...miserable. I spent most of it at my cottage, in the cold basement, with my internetless computer, listening to depressing music, catching up on my sleep. (I must have slept at least an avergae of 12 hours/day at the cottage.) I mean, I did SOME cool stuff during the summer, probably with Matt. I just don't remember any of it. The funnest thing I remember, was taking a knife, and lightly slashing the inside of my arm, over and over. Just moving my arm back and forth really quick, up and down my arm. (Not deep or anything) then taking some After Bite (The stuff you put on bug bites) and rubbing it up my arm. The burning felt...Weirdly cool. I'd swipe it up my arm once, and just freeze in shock. The hand holding the after bite would have like, white knuckles from holding it so tightly. But man, that burning is so addictive. So after a few times of doing that, I look at the container to read what's inside it (You know, just incase it's got something addictivly bad for you in it. Like sugar for example.) It has....*drum roll*...Alchohal (15%). And...Mink oil! If I recal correctly, that's all said on it. So I had been injecting mink oil into my blood stream. Lovely XD So yeah. Highlight of my summer: Mink oil injections at 4 in the morning. Octoberish...Whenever summer ended. Finally! Everything is back to normal. Only thing missing is school every day. In case you didn't notice over the Christmas holidays, I effing hate holidays. They destroy the every-day system I'm used to. Anyway, all summer, I had only seen Deanna like...Three times. Plus I was kind of scared that she hated me now. And since she didn't have fucking msn anymore, and since I can't convert fucking thoughts to words, I couldn't talk to her about it. Anyway, the homeschool group system was back on track. And Deanna's in that homeschool group. I'd go "Hi *wave*" and she's go "Hi *wave back*" whenever we saw each other. Which was pretty much the same as what we did when she had msn. Good sign right? Not really. It's not normal for two people not to talk. So yeah, it was pretty much blah, until...Dun da dun: Early December December 7th. Fucking awesome day. k, another epi/prologue. Back in...Umm...Whenever Deanna had MSN, she was telling me about a job she might get, where she baby sits every day after school. Well, on December 7th, she logged on from the kids' house! That was awesome. Except for the fact that my name was "40 year old pedophile stalker". That was kind of...uhh...awkward. Especialy when she left the room and the little boy asked what pedophile meant XD "It means I'm going to hunt you down and rape you". Man, that kid would have beat the hell out of me if I actualy tried that. k, so anyway, Deanna came on, we talked a bit. with the help of the little girl that she baby-sat, I found out she still liked me! I think. I hope. She may have just been being nice. Whatever. Anyway, next month, it's been one year. However, from like march - december, was like...cut-out. So yeah, take 11 months, and subtract march to december, and you get 2 months. Sounds about right. Yep. December Well, see my december 17th post (http://diaries.suchisthis.com/firestormx/index.php?cmd=view_entry&eid=21) It's when I went with Matt to see Val. -------------------------------------- Man, imagine how long this'd be if I had a social life.