Some criminals are bold in their actions, but lame in their lies. In Columbus, Ohio, in 1996, CHales Kinser and Timothy Lebo stole a car and used it to ram a bank building, jarirng loose a 1,000 poind automated teller machine. Then they chained the battered ATM to the rear fender and managed to drag it across the bank parking lot before the police surrounded them. When the cops asked them waht they were doing, the two men said, with straight faces, that they were hauling off an old washing machine! They ended up getting up to 30 years in prison. In a related story, a forty-one-year-old man broke into a home in North Knoxville, Tennessee, in 1996 and demanded a glass of milk. The shaken resident poired the milk as ordered, then secretly called the police. A few minutes later, the officers arrived, only to hear the suspect deny he had broken into the house and drunk the milk. Thye didn't believe him--especially since the back door had been broken open...and a milk mustache still clung to his upper lip.

Man, I couldn't stop giggling at that last story. Just imagine what the resident was thinking. You're just standing there happily chopping up your veggies, when sudenly some random guy waltz into your kitchen: "Yo bitch, gimme some damn milk or I'll slit your fucking throat." (It says "DEMANDED a glass of milk") So you give him the milk, and go call the cops. They get there and they guy is like "What?! I didn't break in! I live here! I didn't drink the milk either. *wipes mouth* *hides crowbar behind back*" Okay, you can't really explain what my PERFECTLY NORMAL brain is imagining, but it'd make you giggle if you could see it. All righty, What am I doing right now? I'm hiding from Mike on MSN, sitting in a friggin' tiny chair, and spazzing out at my math. More on my math later. In this entry I'll be discusing: 1) Three people read my whole last post! (Two who commented. One told me her comments over MSN. If you actualy read these things, but have nothing to say, just make a random comment, like "Blah", or something. 2) Big T.O. trip! With cookies! And Matt! And Val! And DDR! 3) Umm...Some random IT guy who loves calculus offered to help me with some of my questions! I dont' really call it tutoring, 'cause, well, he's not all that good at tutoring, but he's PRETTY DAMN AWESOME. 4) This crappy weather. 5) My [stolen] theory on how to tell if something's broken or not. 6) Me bombing my math test today. So yeah, if you're not interested in hearing my ground-breaking theory on how to make people comment on your diary, NO WEAPON REQUIRED, or if you don't give a flying fuck about my trip to Toronto to retrieve my cookies, then don't read any further. Unless you care about my math "tutor" who's uber-awesome!...In a nerdy/geeky kind of way... Everything else no one cares about for sure. One (Notes: 1. This technique of getting comments is patent pending-ed by me. 2. No, I'm not that n00b, but it's fun to write weird stuff like this) Okay, imagine you wrote a three thousand word entry about absolutly nothing. You just felt like telling the computer about your life. Because your computer is your best friend. You love the computer. The computer will let you love it, and not tell your girlfriend. Anyway, it was from you to the computer, and you figure "Meh, no one's read the last couple of entries, why would they read this one?" Then, bam! It's been a few days, no one's read it. So you go and write another one. When you're done, you spend a few minutes looking for interesting names on the left, like "1337633k", or "fucktard", or "zelda", and you go and click on their name, and read their current entry, and leave a comment with a question about their entry, or about them or something. (First two names I made up btw) So what'll happen is, they'll click your little name linky thing under your comment to answer your question, and they'll come to your diary. They'll scroll for a bit (depending on their resolution. Mine it's just pgdown a few times to get to "rant back") and finally find the end of your long useless entry. Then, they'll have two choices. 1) Do homework. 2) Read the whole entry, and ask a question about it back, and get a conversation going. This is totaly off topic from here on down The smart person would do 1. I mean, not only is homework better than reading about some random person's life, but it'll help you in the real world! Despite the fact that you'll work hard to get your dream job, go to university, major in whatever you need for your dream job, you step out of the graduation cermimony, and discover that no one needs a north-american worker to do that job now. All the jobs are in fucking China. "Damnit mother fucker! I majored in Oriental Basket Weaving, and the fucking asians come and weave dem damn baskets for 20 cents!" And of course, the school won't tell you when you sign up for the course, that there are null openings for that job in Canada, as it's all being produced for three billion times cheaper, over in Asia. They don't care, so long as you pay for the course. Although, if they start snickering, or their cheeks get all puffy, and their eyes get big, and they look like they're going to explode, then that's generaly a sign that you shouldn't apply for that.particular course. You should go major in...Holy fuck, what can you do here in Canada, that you can't get done cheaper in Asia? I don't know. Anyway, just try and find something that you can use to create something custom. For example, custom wood work, for shops and stuff. You can't just ship a shop over from China now can you? So yeah, that'd be a good idea. That, and buisness. Buisness is always a good thing to major in. However, you can't just go up to some big company and go "Hello Bill Gates! I majored in buisness. I want to apply to be the vice president of Microsoft." No...Buisness is too general, you have major in a certian type of buisness. (Depending on what university/college you go to) "Hello Bill Gates! I majored in crappy-but-expensive-operating-systems-that-no-one-actualy-buys buisness running...thing...Yeah...So make me your Vice President, or I'll kill you." Okay, that won't really get you a job, but yeah... btw, I love Microsoft, and Bill Gates. I'm going to grow up and start a company to be the next Microsoft. Go Microsoft! Yay! *waves mouse around* I love your products! I've thrown this baby at the wall like 5 times, and it still works! So yeah...w00t Microsoft. Operating system kind of sucks, but hey it works...Almost. But everything else by them rocks...Sort of. Yeah... k, back on topic While the utterly bored person would do action number two. Oddly enough, few of the people I commented to actualy read the entry, that I know of anyway. However, two people did read it, and as far as I know, I've never commented on either of their diaries before. organicpeace and emoisafad! I don't really expect (or advise) them to waste any more of their time reading these random entries, but aparently Alanna (aka, emoisafad. She called me "Robbie" in one of her entries, and emoisafad is really hard to type, because I keep pressing space between each word out of habit...So yeah, Alanna) likes my long boring rants. Even though will NEVER help her in the real world...Like, ever. So yeah, neither organicpeace, or Alanna seem to have A.D.D. XD Two Remember I mentioned there was one other person who reads my entries, but comments on them over msn? Her name is Val. I met Val this week. Wednsday to be exact. She had cookies. A couple dozen cookies. Matt came two. He got half the cookies. We played DDR. Val is getting better at DDR. Val is buying DDR. Val spent too much money on me and Matt. "You mean Matt and I" "Uh, sure, Matt and you, whatever makes you happy." I talked...A LOT. I'm uber-sore. Turns out that Matt only likes Val "as a friend". I feel like I tried to get lost in the mall the first time us three met for nothing now. We took the subway. We ate sushi. Val hugged me. She's scary. Thus I stared at her like she's a freak. She's a freak. She drank 4 bottles of water in 5 minutes. *dances around singing 'freak!'* Okay, here's what happened: My mom woke me up at 8:30. "Robbie! Wake up! The bus is leaving in an hour!" Me: "Oh no!" *jumps out of bed full of energy, soars to the shower, is in and out of the shower in 30 seconds, runs back down the stairs, grabs one of those cereal-bars, and runs out the door*. Actualy no, more like "Ungh, they'll wait for me" *rolls over* Then five minutes later, my mom comes back down "Hurry up, the roads are all icy, and it'll take us a while to get there". That's when I got up (not jumped up....Just...Sort of rolled out of bed, fell onto the floor, slowly got up, grabbed a shirt, and slugishly walked up the stairs to the bathroom. Then I put Val's braclet thingy she gave me and Matt last time we met as high up on my arm as it would go, and then I hopped into the shower. Then, after that, I grabbed my backpack, stuffed it full of homework (to do on the train...I only got like one question done though. It was like "if a car swerves to avoid a moose (Yes, that's seriously what it says. You can tell it's Canadian eh =P) how far will it slide before it comes to a stop if the equation is blah blah blah. Turns out it goes 533 METERES! Good bye moose, beaver, and goose.), and waterbottles (You'll find out later). I then proceeded to hop in the car with my mother, and slid on down the road, into a traffic jam! It was all icy right, 'cause of all the freezing rain the night before. So anyway, there were lineups acros like three stop lights and stuff. Anyway, It took us 45 minutes to get to Matt's house. (A 10 minute drive) We then picked up Matt, and headed over to the GO station, and headed to Toronto. Matt thought we were taking the bus, so he told Val that we'd meet her at 10:45 (the TRAIN leaves at 9:40) however, the train is like, three times as fast as the bus, so got there at like 10:20. So we walked around the underground for a while, then we came back above ground; "Oh crap, we're lost. Hey look! A Tim Hortons!" We eventualy found our way back to Union station, a few minutes before Val arrived. SHE HAD COOKIES! So Matt tried to throw out my homework from my backpack to fit the cookies in it, so Val wouldn't have to carry them around in her bag. Stupid Matt. Anyways, after running franticaly down the street in the freezing rain after the grabage truck, and slamming into the back of it when it stopped at a stop sign, I retrieved my math text book, put it back in my backpack, and walked calmly back to where Matt and Val stood, oblivious to the whole escipade. Of course Val and Matt, who weren't paying attention to what I had just done, will tell you something like: "So then Val handed Matt the cookies. Matt then re-arranged Rob's stuff in the backpack to fit the cookies in it." THERE WERE SO MANY COOKIES TOO! Well, sort of. They were big, so it seemed like there was a lot XD They tasted sooooo good too. Especialy with Milk. The peanut butter cookies had little grooves in them, where the milk would stay in them, if you tiled the cookie just right when you took it out of the cup...*drool* *slaps self* Okay, so after wandering around Union for a minute or two, Val pointed out that there was an "exit" sign pointing the direction we just came from, so we turned around, and headed out into the rain, which had become more like a mist, than it was when I was running after my text book. Where were we off to? (Wow, "where" "were" and "we" seem pretty similar eh XD) We were going to Kentucky, we were going to the fair. To see the senioritas, put flowers in their hair -- Hey! I don't remember what that song is from, but it's been stuck in my head since I was 5. Anyway, the fair fucking pwned. Then we headed off to the arcade we went to last time we met, which had DDR. Matt figured it was too far to walk, so we took the subway. TWO TWENTY-FIVE FOR A LITTLE TINY COIN, WHICH YOU INSERT INTO A MACHINE RIGHT BESIDE THE COIN DISPENSER. I'm like "yay! My first subway token! *turns around* Awie *puts coin in machine thing* *sniffle* I didnt' even have a chance to name it T_T" So yeah, subways = fucking waste of money, if you're planning to just go over a few streets. Anyway, we got to the arcade, and, sinec it was a school day, there was like, no one at the DDR machine. We played from like 11 'till 2 or something. I spent 5 bucks, Matt spent like...50 cents. Val paid for EVERYTHING ELSE. I didn't spend any money for the rest of the day that Val was there. So yeah, Matt and I give you our gratitude for that Val =) You can go sell our gratitude on ebay and get back the money you spent on us. For her...Well, pretty much first time playing DDR (She played one song last time) she was pretty good. Better than my first time =P She seemed to know what she was doing =P Oh yeah, that part about Val being a freak. Matt put in our last dollar. And we were all going to have one last song each (1 dollar = 3 songs) so Matt went first, so me and Val are standing there watching him. Then out of no where Val hugs me. Man, it was like anime. It felt like my face turned all red, and I got all stiff and stuff. She scared me. o.o Anyway, after DDR, we...Damn, I don't remember what we did. *goes over to read the entry in Val's blog* Okay, after DDR we...Meh, screw it. I'll just copy and paste from Val's blog what we did, with some minor edits. (Plagerism and such)

So yeah once they had enough of ddr we went and had lunch (well they did, I didn't I just sat there and watched them eat and listen to them talk about stuff lol)... [me]I was only talking because I was tired. I talk a lot when I'm tired. [/me] Once they finished eating Matt decided we were gonna walk around so we went down to this basement parking lots place but he didn't want to get lost again so we turned around and went back so bobert and I just laughed lol...while we were walking down there Bobert and I kept whispering and Matt kept turning and around and telling us to stop which I thought was funny because you'd really think he were paranoid considering we weren't even talking about him really lol... Well we ended up having to stop by this sushi place because Matt "had" to get some sushi lol...ewww raw fish!! yuck!! then we went into radio shack or some electronic store b/c Matt wanted to check it out (big surprise eh Bobert =P lol). We ended up at some other food court where Matt decided to eat his sushi! eww! lol and Bobert tried some and said it was spicy hot and I just laughed because Matt called him a sissy lol... We had no idea what to do next and that's when Matt got mad/ frustrated which was funny because when he's frustrated he looks funny lol...so he said until we figured out what we were gonna do he wasn't moving. He didn't move until Bobert started sliding across the floor lol which was hilarious because Matt's like "OMG I don't know you!" lol...We decided to walk through the "PATH" which is like an underground walkway sort of thingamabobber lol...we walked soooooo far but it was a total blast! Then we went outside and stood by this totally huge building and Matt and Bobert were talking about going inside of one and saying that we should ride all the way to the top and stuff lol it was funny. While we were standing under this building, there were literally sheets of ice that were falling to the ground. Then Bobert did the most hilarious thing ever! He's like omg I'm gonna go catch one! So this huge piece of ice falls down and he chases after it but didn't get it in time and again matt's like "OMG you're such a loser! lol" lol it was hilarious... We ended up walking in the rain all the way to the train station...now think walking from the arcade place, to the mall, through the mall, through the streets of toronto to Union Station. Yeah 'nough said I know lol...well we got there eventually and I treated the guys to a cinnabon =P...which they inhaled basically you'd think they never ate before hehe lol..speaking of which...at lunch time Bobert pulled out the cookies I made him (the whole 4 dozen cookies for Bobert and 4 dozen for Matt lol and started chowing down on them hehe) so that was funny but then Matt told him to put them away because it looked funny lol... anyways...we sat at Cinnabon and joked around and talked a lot and around 3:10pm I decided I should buy my ticket for the train lol so I got in line and realised that the train was leaving at 3:13pm so I basically had to run to catch the train and leave them back there all alone to wait for their train which I didn't feel so good about doing. I don't like leaving my friends alone :(...I wish we all left at the same time! But then again...they left me last time to wait for my bus like 45 minutes all by myself! so ha! lol... [me]After Val left, me and Matt ended up deciding to take the 4:20 train home, then we went and played DDR for an hour. Spent some more money on the subway/DDR machine.[/me] so yeah that's basically it...except that I got some news yesterday that basically crushed my heart into pieces...well I'm sure most of you already know that I like Matt a heck of a lot so I don't have to hide it really lol...well I asked Bobert to ask Matt if he liked me at all and I got the answer I had hoped to god I wasn't going to get!! Well he said he only liked me as a "Friend" do you realise how much I hate that word now!!

Okay, I have no idea what to say about that last paragraph. If anyone has anything to say to Val, leave a comment and I'll pass it on. Summary: Toronto = Fucking awesome. Cookies = DAMN FUCKING AWESOME. Matt doesn't like Val in that way. So yeah, give me something to tell her. Three Isn't math awesome? Hell yeah it is. But sometimes it gets too complex for your young mind to grasp, and you get uber-frustrated. That's when you hunt down a nerdy-timid-math-loving dad from one of the kids in your homeschool group, and get him to help you. This guy was SO cool in my opinion. He works for HP, as a mainframe...Uhh...Director person. He's married. Got three kids. Works from home. Knows a couple programing languages. Graduated from Univeristy. Loves math. Is nice. Yeah, anyway, he's awesome. And he really helped me. Four Fucking weather! It was like +18 celcius on the thirteenth! That's the warmest January 13th since like, 1815 or something. The next day it was like -13. 30 degree difference in two days. Holy fuck eh? I'd like a moment (1 minute) of silence for my snow fort. Fucktard. You didn't stop reading for a minute did you? You just read from the moment of silence line, and went directly to this one. Grrr. I have to do everything for you don't I? 1 one thousand. 2 one thousand. 3 one thousand. 4 one thousand. 5 one thousand. 6 one thousand. 7 one thousand. 8 one thousand. 9 one thousand. 10 one thousand. 11 one thousand. 12 one thousand. 13 one thousand. 14 one thousand. 15 one thousand. 16 one thousand. 17 one thousand. 18 one thousand. 19 one thousand. 20 one thousand. 21 one thousand. 22 one thousand. 23 one thousand. 24 one thousand. 25 one thousand. 26 one thousand. 27 one thousand. 28 one thousand. 29 one thousand. 30 one thousand. 31 one thousand. 32 one thousand. 33 one thousand. 34 one thousand. 35 one thousand. 36 one thousand. 37 one thousand. 38 one thousand. 38 one thousand...Just Kidding! 39 one thousand. 40 one thousand. 41 one thousand. 42 one thousand. 43 one thousand. 44 one thousand. 45 one thousand. 46 one thousand. 47 one thousand. 48 one thousand. 49 one thousand. 50 one thousand. 51 one thousand. 52 one thousand. 53 one thousand. 54 one thousand. 55 one thousand. 56 one thousand. 57 one thousand. 58 one thousand. 59 one thousand. 60 one thousand. There. Yes, I have no life, typing all that out. Thank goodness for macros though. Otherwise I would of had to type all that out XD Anyway, all the snow melted. Then it froze the next day. Can anyone say "FREE PUBLIC SKATING!"? XD Five I was talking with my friend Joe, on MSN about how my mouse wasn't working. He says it's from me throwing it at stuff. "Then again, when I threw mine at the wall, it fixed the doubleclicking problem." So we talked about that for a while. We eventualy ended up with:

Joe - Quoth the Apple website: "Do not chew iPod shuffle" says: so remember young bobert, nothing is really truly broken until you submit it to the wall chucking test

Oh the senarios I can think of... *drops fine china plate* Whoops. Meh, don't worry about it mom. It's probably not REALLY broken. *Whips plate at the wall* Okay, yeah, it's broken. *drives a friend's ferari into a light post* Whoops, well, yeah, it does look kind of dented. But it's not actualy broken...I don't think...Let's find out. *Hits a wall doing 400* *drops 3dsmax cd* Okay, it doesn't look too bad...It'll probalby still work. Then again, you can never be too sure. *whips cd at wall* Aw crap. Oh well, I'll just download it. Six k, this is a "venting" edit. It's got nothing to do with anything, so just skip over it. I FUCKING HATE MY MATH TEACHER's way of doing things. Okay, so I have test in math today. For those of you who don't know, I'm homeschooled, and do all my highschool courses through the internet. Anyway, I asked my math teacher to e-mail me the test, and she did. Now, in all my other courses, the teacher sends the test in the e-mail, and the timer for the text doesn't start until the attatchment is opened. You open up the e-mail, read the instructions (How much time you have, etc), then download the attchment whenever you feel like doing the test. Well, naturaly I figured the math test was the same. So today (saturday) I wanted to know how much time I had to do the exam. So I opened up the e-mail, and right there in big bold letters: "You have 120 minutes to print out the exam, complete it, and fax it back, starting now". Oh boy did I ever spaz. I hadn't even opened my text book to review anything. Okay, some of you may know (Mike in particular) that I really hate it when people say "god damn", or "Jesus Christ" or other stuff like that. "WHAT THE GOD DAMN FUCK. JESUS CHRIST I HAVN'T EVEN OPENED MY GOD DAMN TEXT BOOK TO READ ANY OF THE FUCKING STUFF IN THIS GOD DAMN TEST." So open it, print it out, etc. Normaly I'm uber-fucking irritable during any test. Like, if you touch me, I'll fucking punch you. I can't handle stress AT ALL. "Yeah, we need you to get this done by next year if possible." "DON'T FUCKING RUSH ME! JUST LEAVE ME THE FUCK ALONE OR I'LL HIRE MIKE TO FUCKING KILL YOU! *starts ripping out hair from head*" But man, when you spend half an hour on the first fucking quesiton, and end up just giving up with just two lines of the solution writen out...Then you move on to the next question, which you can't do, so you move on, etc...I would have fucking stabbed you in the eye with my pencil if you so much as sniffled. Anyway, there was 36 questions on the test. I got 7/10 points on the first section. Then, on the rest of the test I got something like, "10/70". 17/80 on a test that's like...half midterm. k, here's how my online math course works: There's 20 modules. There's a test at module 7 (the one I did) a test at module 15, and the final exam at 20. I can't believe I fucking bombed it! I'm getting like 60-70% right now, then I fail this test...AND THIS WAS THE FUCKING EASY TEST TOO! It didnt' have ANYTHING about calculus in it. It was all about functions and logarithms. If I had like, an evening to go back and memorize the formulas, I could have aced it. I knew exactly what to do for everything...Minus the formulas to do it. 10 = 2(4)^(3x-2) Simple right? Just do some log stuff. Guess what. I don't remember how they work. 2+2 = x Simple right? just addition stuff. Guess what. I don't remember how to add. f(x) = 3x^4 + 2x^2 - 4x + 3 Simple right? It's just a pretty looking function right? Guess what. I just got promoted to Mod on TS forums. What are the odds of that? Rules: No swearing *looks up at current entry* I'm going to feel so hypocritical when I ban someone for excesive swearing. --Wait, can mods ban people? Hmm, I'll have to test it on some random person some time. k, anyway. uber-fucking pissed that my math teacher doesn't know how to tell when an attatchment has been opened. Man. I can't believe I got 17 points on my fucking test. Fuck.