my caffiene pills are looking more and more attractive. im planning on starting piano up again soon. but i always forget to call penny at a reasonable time. but i miss it, dearly. ive been listening to music i wouldnt normally listen to a lot lately. i.e., classical, country (mostly when im with trent hehe, but i think sarah and trent have worked me up to liking it somewhat) i just got the sims 2 yesterday and i am already completely obsessed with it. i can barely rip myself away from it. my bookshelf is more than overflowing. i have stacks and stacks of books on it that will not fit in the shelves. on one hand, ive got a good start to having that library. but on a second hand, howcome i cant stop spending money when i dont need anything?? somehow, i actually have an A in language arts. i figured i would have a c, but its a solid A. It kind of caught me off guard and scared the crap out of me. I realized today that I miss Mrs KH. (of course i miss KGB too). but i realized how much i missed her when i saw her in the hall today after school, and she told me about a poetry contest that i should enter. i hope i have her next year for AP lit. i like mrs nigro. her sarcasm is brutal, but i think she is quite funny. that said, i really like all of my teachers this year, except for Frau. she's ok sometimes. but frankly, she will be laughing one minute, and screaming at someone the next, and it freaks me out. and i dislike how she loves to pretend that everyone in the class likes each other and we are all friends and get along perfect. how she ignores it when the bullies of the class call other kids fags and stuff like that, and makes those same kids work with the bullies. and how she has this weird kind of nice meanness that she exerts on me sometimes. i feel so so stressed. its driving me crazy. i never have any free time anymore, and at the same time i dont know what i would do if i did, because im so used to rushing around in a frenzy all day. it drives my mind crazy to think about the fact that the smallest detail can change someones future. what would my life be like right now if i had done what i wanted to and not gone to the mall? what would his be like? what would hers be like? i hate this time. i fucking hate the 90s and 00s. what are people going to remember our world as in one thousand years? will there even people like us in a thousand years? sadly i can completely picture the world a thousand years ago being straight out of Fahrenheit 451. or worse. except no forests. im too tired for this. and like aleks said. i cannot stress enough how much i regret that i didnt pay attention in her class. she is so wise! why dont they have her teach highschool to kids that actaully WANT to know the stuff? and all we did was just sit and fuck around on the computer. i want to smack myself. i dunno, i really need to talk to her again.