things have changed so dramatically since i started this journal, every single person that i was so close to so long ago has left me. or vice versa. i know this isnt my fault at all, but im still clinging to the thought that everything happens for a reason. there is a reason that im detatched this year. theres a reason why everyone is gone. its just me and my art, staring me in the face. it cant hide anymore. im probably going to end up moving, i better detatch myself as much as possible. but i miss chris and shaylah and laura and becca and...brittany even though shes still here somewhat. i hate how things are different even though i am happy, and confident. a part of me would give anything to have black hair again and be miserable all the time. as much as i look back and shudder at who i used to be, i dont a regret a thing. plus, it got me to where i am today.