okie..im gonna sound like a little hippie right now but hey i guess i am one right? anyway..this is about womens rights...in mexico.. (go watch the music video for the somng im listening to and you'll understand) In some cities close to the border of mexico have large numbers of murders of women...In the past ten years, apx. 370 women have been abducted/raped/killed. at least 300 if not all of them remain unsloved i know im such like a loser for caring but i do... that's more that 2 women a month who are victims.. and police don't do much... like nothing.. i guess there are using something-446 to give internation pressure but it's not working.. but still 370 murders unsloved.. that is fucked up... idk maybe i just another stoner hippie.. well yea. anyway... i go to get katie in 2 hours im excited.. i've missed her... but now im really wondering about the women in mexico... dammit. i hate it when i get all emotional.. my friends prolly just died... i never get emotional if i can help it. w/e. britty's in PA, so i guess im just chillin by myself tonight... wicked cool.. unless i do something with katie but i doubt that will happen... Im starting to get sick of the people here... i mean i love some of them dearly and would die if they were away from me too long.. but others need to just fuck off.. guh.. and i've realized that i don;t know what i want in life... at all... i wanna travel.. because i start getting attached to people if i stay in one place too long and then miss them... then again i could just get attached in one day and then dwell on my love for them for the rest of my life... but i really don;t know what i wanna do anymore.. now that disney decided to fuck up and get rid of artists who actually draw... and i don;t want a relationship because i hate opening up to people...i open to brittnie and only when im totally fucked up... i only ever really opened up a few times... and dammit i need her today... god i hate people.. no wonder relationships..even just with friends are ones i just dont want... maybe i should want them.. instead just 'hi' one night stand the 'oh what;s ur name?' idk.. i really have no clue what i want anymore... and in my shrink appt today we talked about how he thinks my dad has ocd and i think he;s bipolar... prolly b/c he either acts like he could be my 7 year old brother or an abusive father... and he changes randomly so u never know which will be next... and you can't talk to him about it cuz then he'll pull im the authority thing and scream at you til you have to go away before you grab the knife that he's been waving at you and stick it in his chest... but that doesn;t help anything to talk about it..Gep's advice: it's just annoyance you'll have to live with for a few more years... or a few hours if i kill myslef before then... nah i dunno how i'd do it... yes i do... overdose... i need to get off of here.. now... before i decide that i actually am fucked up.. hell i could be... but im probably just a complaining teenager.. but how do you know the difference?