beep beep beep beep beep beep beep beep. i've been denied all the best ultra sex. actually on that note.. next monday is an anniversary of a sort. novemeber 7/8th. it marks that i've been "unpure" for a year. thats realy scary. i feel defective. tainted. almost unloved. wow.. a fucking year of fucking. crazy. what does one do on such a day? do i get a cake or something? is it like a birthday? hmmm i really don't know what to do about it. ... j00 brought up a good point tho.. would i feel the same way if i was a guy? .... hmmm. i think i would b/c im a fucking emoish girl.. j00 brings another point: it wasn;t meaningful sex so that could play a part in me feeling slutish. yea not meaningful.. how could it have been? i guess the lesson is don't sleep with guys the day u meet them.. it took two guys for that to set into my mind.... but i still get.. urges. i like spontaneous sex.... i guess that's a bad thing. it's gotten me this far.