guh... why couldn't i have hated him like a normal child.... all i wanted to do was trust them, and one by one they turned on me to devoir my sanity. take it please... it isn't doing me any good anymore... all i can think about now is them.. and why i stilled called him a friend after, when i should have hated him... hahhaha.. and no one will understand this entry but my real journal and bitty.. woah. hiccups... fuck fuck fuck. if someone severly screws up the way u see your life and causes you to block out parts in your mind, shouldn;t you at least be unhappy with them? be but no... i have to work things in a fucked up way.... and thanks to this have lost the ability to ever have trusted anyone... never love... welcome to a world with no emotions..