Well today started off with a bang. I wake up to my grandmas words "tiffani, your cousin nate died last night" i was still half asleep and it took a second to sink in .. apparently he choked on his own vomit. its sad because he was sick witht he flue and had been in the hospital once.. he was complaining about a headache and his dad told him to quit being a wimp and go to bed. so he did. and the rest is self explanatory. its really sad and tragic i wish i actually felt worse about it. he was only 19 and hes fucking family. its like nothing happened and everyone else is sad. so thats why im cold. where is my heart. but i did go to marsh with adriana to get food for our feast. that was.. interesting. oh well time to go run