i swear.. breakdown is my middle name well lets see.. last night i called james at 10:15 like he said to.. but he couldnt talk cause he was with a ton of people. and lately we havent been able to talk for more then 15 min. or so. so ive been kinda upset over that as well. so i told him, i felt bad cause he felt horrible. i felt like an asshole for expecting him to talk to me a ton. but we havent talked for more then 15 min. since about the 20th or something. so i needed to talk to him. hes like my medicine. we were both upset for a while but i had to refrain from hanging up on him.. whihc i wanted to do so badly. but i knew it would hurt both of us. so i didnt, but i tld him that it was hard to not hang up on him at that moment. so we talked about that for 20 min. and he told me to call back at 11. when he would really be able to talk. i was sick of being put on "hold" as i put it. so i reluctantly called back at 11. and we talkd about everything untill about 2:30. when we both needed sleep bad. and now i feel fine, like nothing is eally bothering me other then the fact i miss him like fucking crazy! but im fine in other words. im glad i kinda freaked out cause other wise i dont think we would have had such a great talk last night. two more days till hes home