today i went to speak with the transfer counsler... hehe... i have options! she said i could choose to go to ucsd, uci, or ucla!! the future looks promising! "say hello to all the apples on the ground they were once in your eyes but you sneezed them out while sleeping..." eesh, i just noticed how many posts i have... haha... a lot, at least for me it is. i started talking to a guy that's obsessed with his ex... he reminds me of my 15 yr. old self... i try to give him hope. we're compatible... it's shame... if only i could change the past... still... this is nice... i mean... i doubt i would have been able to do this while being so intimately involved with such an interesting individual... hm... that sounds a little odd. "death is easy" right. he reminded me of what my current situation. i have mixed emotions toward the subject, i had forgotten this. "you're an adult but you cant do anything... cant move out.. cant choose not to go to church" there's so much more. i forget... all i have is my education... i'm risking so much... if i take one wrong step, my parents and my sister... ay. it's really upsetting to have someone you admire tell you that... ay.. i can't even repeat it. she's doing it, consciously.. and she doesn't care!! she hadn't even thought of the consequences! UGH! it's almost futile... almost... all i have is my education... and even that is in he hands of a child... that's right... despite the fact that she's older... she's still a child.. at least more so than i. come on obama, help us out! there's so many of us! we've learned the language, the culture! we have potential! send me that green light!! someday. hehe, a war against an enemy, easy! a war against a tactic... haa, ludircrous.