man the weekend went too fast. i feel soo crappy today. i really hate being up this early. it should be a crime. i went to bed late because i couldn't fall asleep unless my father was home for some reason. i just didn't feel right. i guess i was worried. but i am worried all the time, just usually not about him. my brother went to the darkness concert last night in detroit. i hope hes alrite. he went with a bunch of friends and his girlfriend. they were staying the night. tonight is going to suck. i have to finish up my canvassing, which means i have to knock on every door and be up close with selfish little rich bastards too self obsessed. tech always makes me feel sick, and depressed. i think it's because of the people. i don't have any friends in this class so, that sucks, and my teachers a jerk and the people here aren't very friendly. my friend's friend has this class, but she isn't my friend, an aquientance maybe, but no friend. i don't think i hope my friend has nothing to do tonight and can come on my bus. i like it when she comes over, even if its only for like an hour and a half. Fuck this stupid cartoon i can't get anywhere with it because it keeps screwing up. i have no clue what i am actually doing. like there is no story at all. and when i try to make one the whole cartoon FUCKS up. i heard something terrible today. i heard that this little girl who was kidnapped like a couple months ago, was found dead. isn't that horrid? i am think about getting another bunny. because the pain of the loss of hunter is still there. im thinking maybe getting another will take my mind off of it, and i will be able to carry on. the priest told me animals don't go to heaven. which made me cry, so i looked it up on the net. and i found this. I know animals have a soul. God doesn't create something only to throw it away. God created animals first, so He must have a "thing" for critters. God created man to take care of the animals; He even had us name them. Plus, someone has to take care of the animals in Heaven and when the Lord returns. A world without animals would be a drag. God said He would give us the desires of our heart. I desire my animals. God gives animals to us for comfort when we are lonely; or because we need companionship - or to keep our feet warm in winter. God is not an "indian giver". Why would God give me a mansion devoid of animals? They have to stay someplace.... Animals are capable of love. God is love! It made me feel a alot better. i am going to tell the priest the first one, see what he says. i hate that priest, i know that sounds horrible, but hes a jerk. omg i am totally going to hell. i can't wait until this class is over. ugh i hate it. there is some chick playing the shittiest music ever. i wish i had a shotgun to blow my brains out the music is so annoying. there is 20 minutes left of this frigging class. i am going to bang my head against the wall. i should have brought my discman. please god help me. i have to hide my wrist and arm today. hopefully no one will notice. usually my friend always notices. so i have to be way more careful around him. i don't want anyone thinking that i want pity, not like that faggot iamsharre said. i used to always black out when i was upset. it felt like i knew i shouldn't be just sitting there, but i couldn't help it, it felt like i couldnt move. i am messed up. I am getting two tattoos,one when i am 16, and one when i am 18. i still need a labret, but i am afriad that the Y might get mad, even though alot of people who work there have piercings, i wonder if volunteers can too? maybe waiting till next summer will be best, but i just want it before anyone else gets one. the clock on this computer is wrong. i tried to change it, but u need to be an adminstrator to do that. i hate schools. i found that if i have a really long entry, no one will comment, but if i have a short one, people will commment. i am tired. i am done.