I think things are extremely good with R. He called me today, and we talked on the phone/internet for 3 hours. wow. i can't even believe that he still wants to talk me to after seeing me and everything. wow. that boy is incredible. he said to me, "i dont see how anyone could no like you" i was like...awww....fuck. i know this is going to end with me crying, but right now, i just feel so good. i don't want anything to ruin this moment. i know something will. Nicole will probably fuck things up. ahh. I hate having feelings for people. i hate it. it complicates my life and takes over my mind and i always get hurt in the end. I asked him what we were. cuz he said "hey we arent internet pals anymore" and he was like "i dont know" and i said "we shud figure that out" and he agreed. what the fuck does that mean? and it was OFFICIALLY my first date. wow i'm a LOSER