Today was a waste of a day. i didn't go to school because i still felt like crap from yesterday so i didn't go to school. I'm at my wits end, with my friend. she makes me so mad. she doesn't give a shit about me. i just don't know what to do. last night i wanted to die. and i sent her an email, and she didn't even care. she didn't even..ugh. i wanted to die again. i mean, *you shouldn't have to make your friends ask you if your okay* (becky's words) I'm not sure what to do. I'm not sure what i am going to do. I'm out of my mind with confusion. i don't want to be a fool, for this. i don't want to give up my therapy. I'm going crazy. I'm lost in all this, and no one is there to help me. no one. fuck, it would be easier if i just died. i know it.