so fuck family. they suck balls. god where can i go? Last night i stopped myself from cutting. yay go sam. now i'm regretting it. fuck i should of dug quite deep. anyway. so now they are mad at me again tonight. i wanted to stay on the computer and offered my laptop. i could have said he couldn't use that one either. but did i ? no i let him fucking use the god damn laptop and where did that leave me? they all constantly tell me that i can't get my way every time i want it, but then fucking condrict themselves when it comes to something that they want. fuckers. god how did i end up here? i wish i knew. My concert is tomorrow. with giselle and angie. i don't even know whats happening tomorrow. people are so god damn disorgainsed. fuckers. i guess i am too. Guess what?! i failed math. Yep made it out with a 43. i knew i would though, so it's not a surprise. i'm just going to take an improvement course this summer. i have no fucking idea how i'll get there. prolly walk my ass over to the bus stop and take the 12 wharncliffe. Maybe i'll disappear. i really want too. how would that make them feel. if they woke up one day and i was just gone. just fanished without a trace. hope they fucking cry for making me feel so fucking trapped. Assholes. somebody kill me. somebody just fucking take a bat and crush my skull in. why do some people die when they feel alive. and so many people are living dead. it's just retarded. like some sick joke that this fucking world finds hilarious. well fuck you for making me the butt of your god damn jokes. I'm so angry now. i don't know why. i used to get sad. right now i'm sad. think i'll cut myself. i won't pussy out. i won't. this is the end of things. at least i want them to be. but you know i'll pussy out. anyway. i'm alway tired of ranting. Later.