Sometimes I forget about this place. It's funny, it used to be the place I wrote about every moment. Kindof like my handwritten journal. But lately, these past few months, I haven't been doing much of that. Sometimes i'll remember and a moment will be marked. But it's different. I think that's a good thing. So, he's bought his ticket. He's booked his hotel. He has his passport. He's sent the Visa stuff, and is now waiting. He's really coming. I still don't know how I'm going to pull it off. Sometimes I just get really excited. I start to dream about the most simplest things. Things i've never experienced. Just him being here. Being able to talk to him. Just being able to be with him. But I worry. I still worry. So much. I thought it was getting better, and in a way it was. But in another, I just don't know. The truth is, this is really hard. I've always believed that sometimes "love isn't enough". And... this isn't even love. Is it? But on the other hand, I just have to see. I can worry about that part later. I hate being so far away. But worst of all, I hate that I don't have much of a life here. I wish I were still living somewhere else. What if this isn't good for me? It doesn't matter. want him. Sometimes I wonder what the point of writing in here is if no one is reading.