i should have went out. it's only a quarter to eight, there is still plenty of time, but i've settled on my bed and i know i wont have the strength to get up. i miss my long hair, i miss having more money and of course, i miss summer. the smell of it, and the green grass, and being able to wear a dress! i also, miss the freedom that comes with being healthy. mentally and physically. every two hours i'm popping a new pill. i feel very much like a guinea pig, returning to my doctor's office every week, with a whole new list of symptoms. i despise it. i'm still bleeding excessively. my iron is lowering and it's the main cause of my current weakness. i'll blame my lack of will on my deficiency, too. sigh.