I don't deny that we should take some time apart, some time for ourselves; but I do disagree that breaking up for good is the only way to solve our problems. As hard as it is to live without you, breaking up just seems like an easy way out. I understand that our problems hurt you both mentally and physically and I need you to understand that I will no longer bring those pains to you. I want to back off with a lot of what we do, the things we both consider to be normal behavior within our relationship. Instead of counting on that phone call at 9pm and getting upset or worried about what you might be doing, I want to live my life without knowing exactly when you will call, not counting on that call at a specific time and just be happy when the call does come. Instead of wondering if you are out with anyone in particular, I don't want it to matter anymore. I realize, now, that I mentioned marrying you. What did I think, that if I married you then you would have no life, you would be mine and nothing more? It was kind of strange of me to want to spend the rest of forever with you yet not want you away from me at all. I want you to go out, I want you to have fun. I want people to come visit you as much as you want them to. I want you to be happy in every aspect of your life, with your relationship in respect to love, with your friendships, with your family, with your job, with school, with everything that life has to throw at you. I know school and work and love can all be stressful, but if you look at it in a new light they all seem to be helpful in regard to each other. I love you, and am here for you to vent about your job and school. Your job gives you the money to make it through school. School gives you the education to further your career and allows you to find a job doing exactly what you want, where you want to be and at the pay you wish to receive. As a teacher, you will never make the amount you deserve, and as such a wonderful woman, you will never find a man who deserves you. I want you to think about us, and really look at all the problems we had. I want you to pick out each and every one of them and think about what caused the fight, or what stressed you out. Once you find out all the problems, and then compare them to what I am saying I want to do to fix them, see if a solution is possible. We fought about you going out, about you not wanting to talk to me for long periods of time, but Dawn, I am telling you that things are changing. I will always want to hear your beautiful voice as much as possible, but I can now live my life for more than just the phone call. I will let other things take up some of my free time and just be grateful for whatever means we get to talk and for however long we get to talk. If online is the only means some days, that is fine. If some days you are just too busy with school and work and everything, let me know you are to overloaded and I won't bug you, I will let you come to me when you have the chance. I guess what I am saying is I want to be there for you when you need me, and not be there making you come to me. I want you to love me, and be there for me during times of need, however it wasn't ever a question of if you would be there for me.... you were always there for me. Dawn, I can't prove anything to you without you giving me another chance. I want to take the time to really talk this out with you, really find out what it is that bothers you, or why you feel the need to not be with me. I need to understand if what I have to give, with all the changes, will help or not. I need to understand if there are any outside things affecting us that I cannot see. I need to know if you are interested in anyone else, if you love anyone more than you love me. If you want to be with anyone else. I love you and just feel we need to sit down and talk things out, if not so we can again be together, then at least so that I don't spend all of my time dwelling on where I went wrong and what I can do to make you see that I want to do everything for you. I love you... With all of my heart. Aaron