I'm going to a church Christmas service rehersal at 2:00pm today. I feel a bit guilty about going to church at the moment. I don't really know what I believe about anything to do with church, but I still feel oblidged to go. I can't win. Whichever way I do it, I feel guilty. I feel guilty about everything recently. Everything I do always makes things worse. Like last night, when I felt like I might like a certain someone and I felt really guilty because I'm already "taken". But I don't really want to be because I like the guy who I'm not going out with more. I feel so stupid. Even if I did ask that guy out he'd say no anyway. And then I'd feel even worse. I keep trying to write more, but everything I try to say sounds so pathetic and stupid. My life is so paltry compared to some people on here who actually have decent things to say. Rachel ----- I'm so confused