Well guys, I screwed up.

I think I have some serious issues. Because yet again, I screwed up!

I have no idea what's wrong with me.

This morning at 6:30, Jules got me up, feeling insecure about something, and I got frustrated with her. I just didn't see why she was insecure. I didn't get it, and she had every right to get mad at me the way she did. All I had to do was give her a honest, straight answer, and instead I got mad.

Because I'm stupid. I just didn't get it.

I know now, after a lot of thought that what I did was stupid. I REALLY screwed up.

Because I love her. I love her so much it hurts. And when she hurts, I can't breathe. If I lose her, I think I'll die. There's no way I'd be able to carry on. I would have a hole inside me that would never go away, for the rest of my life.

I'd be hollow. A Tin Man with no heart.

And I'm scared that's what's going to happen.

I really screwed up.

And my sister stuck up for me, fighting my battles when I should be fighting them on my own. I love her to death, but I need to do this on my own.

I need to man up and fix this. Because I don't want to lose her.

I love her more than life itself. I would stop the universe from spinning if it would make her smile. I would run through all the cities over all the world, screaming about how much I love her. She's my whole world. She's the only one I want to kiss goodnight, and the only face I want to make up to in the morning. She's the only one I want to spend my days with, and the one I want to spend the rest of my life with.

I love her. I love her soooooo damn much.

I just hope I can make it better. So that we're happy.

Because she means the world to me. I'd give my life for her if it was necessary. Without question. She IS my whole world. She's the reason I'm still breathing. She's the only reason I still get up in the morning and face the day.

I love you Julie!