Lets start at the beginning and end at the end. I think things are always easier to understand when they are told that way. So, last night I talked to Nick for a while, Josh wasn't on so I was able to pay enough attention for us to have an okay conversation. I showed him this diary and he decided to get one of his own. He's anb4life. I'll let you read his entry to see where he got the username from. He tried putting it up last night but the site was being bitchy, so I unno when it will be up. Anyway, today I was woken up by my mother and sister fighting about how if my mother wanted to go get my permit she should have woken me up. I got very pissed off at being woken up, and cursed at my sister. I went to the dentist, which I hate. The novocaine shots didn't hurt as bad as they normally do, which was nice(ish) but the crap she put in my mouth to hold it open hurt enough to make up for it. My mouth is still sore from the shots though. It took about 45 minutes. After that, while my sister was getting her teeth fixed, I persuaded my mom to give me a fiver and let me walk to Dairy Queen for something to eat. The DQ is only about a five minute walk from the Health Department so it wasn't bad. It was nice to take a walk alone, especially with the promise of a Mr. Pibb float. But because the right side of my mouth was numb and I was trying to walk back and drink it at the same time, I dribbled quite a bit of it on my shirt. Halfway back my mom picked me up in the car and we went to the grocery store to pick up a few things. Rest of the day was uneventful until this evening when there was a family fight. Over something stupid, like ususal. I was grounded to my room and my throat was sore from yelling, so I took a hot bath and drank some coffee (at the same time) while listening to The Cure. It calmed me down, and when I asked my mother if I could use the computer she agreed, and here I am. Did you expect it all to stop at the wave of your hand? Like the sun's just gonna drop if its night you demand. Well in the dark we're just air, so the house might dissolve. But once we're gone who's gonna care, if we were ever here at all? Well, summer's gonna come its gonna cloud our eyes again. No need to focus when there's nothing that's worth seeing. So we trade liquor for blood in an attempt to tip the scales. I think you lost what you loved in that mess of details. They seemed important at the time, but now you can't even recall any names faces, or lines; its more the feeling of it all. Well winter's gonna end I'm gonna clean these veins again. So close to dying that I finally can start living...