i think i'm pmsing, but i don't know. i don't really know how to say this, but i feel like i'm losing my bestfriend. i don't even think she considers me one of her best friends anymore. i've known mackenzie since we were 5, and well i always considered her one of my bests. as we grew older, she became more popular with the boys...and well i just kinda didn't. well, we were close until this year. this year she met ryan. ryan changed her. he sucked her into his little world. she goes over to his house every single day. its like she has no time for me. i'll call her to make plans, but she'll be too busy, or she'll sound like she really doesn't want to talk to me. its bringing me to tears... i don't have any other best friend. i don't have that close circle of people. it tears my heart out because i feel like she just doesn't love me anymore. even if she says 'luv ya' as we hang up the fone...i dunno. she says our relations ship is like a rubberband, that it stretches. but it can only stretch so far before it breaks. i feel like if we keep going like this...it will break. not to the point of a fight...but to the point of just...not being like we used to. i miss her so much. i miss my old boy crazy mackenzie, tha thad a new crush ever other month. i haven't heard her talk about any other boys besides ryan. and i dunno, i can't bash on ryan, since i dont know him that well...but he's stealing her away from me. and i don't have anyone else. i can't believe i'm actually crying over this buti've felt like this for so long... i just needed to talk about it. i've been trying to make plans with her, to call her every day. she'll never call me. i feel like she gets annoyed when i call. even though it sounds stupid, i used to be on her profile, next to keri and ryan with inside jokes and stuff. but i've been pushed aside. and maybe she found new bestfriends. i didn't. i don't think she knows how much it hurts me. i thought we would be friends forever. she'd be one of my bridesmaid, when we were younger we were planning a trip to europe the summer after we graduated. i can't see that happeneing anymore. it seems like everyone has been saying that she's different...that she's not how she used to be. she's pushed people away from herself. i wouldn't be surprised if she and ryan do get married eventually...and then they'll have the rest of their lives together... i don't know what to do... i feel like i have to be penciled in for her time... she's forgotten me.