i am pretty much bad news betty. i don't know who more depressing could be than me. either god hates me (which means ishould start praying) or something is seriously wrong with me. once again i lost. lose lose lose is all i get. i lost for editor-in-chief. that one position i was dreaming of having since i was a little freshman. fuck yea. the record, as it stands is 0-4. and the phrase i have heard at least 10million times in the past 2 months "hadas you so deserved it" fuck yea. what is wrong with me. what am i doing wrong. probability wise, i should win something. anything. no. nothing. hadas you suck. as much as people might tell you you deserve it, the way things have been going show tha tyou don't. stop trying. my parents couldn't believe, another one down the drain. my mom was in disbelief when i told her. nothing is the way it seems. what did i do why why why why why why why why why why why why everything i know i can do well, everything i will put my heart into like no other everything that eveyrone else tells me i deserve. why nothing. i know i shouldn't be as depressed as i am about everything, as saddening as losing positions is, i think the consistent defeat is what really got me today. all the 'what ifs' and 'i could have beens' just imagine mulitple boys breaking your heart mulitple tiimes. and it never ends. i'm considering to stop trying. after one loss, i kept trucking. 2, no biggie. 3, getting a little much. 4....well now something is going wrong. hadas something is going wrong, and from the looks of it that something is you. fuck up.